Feel Like Crying… SCREAMING

Well, my brother continues to screw over his ex-wife. Today in family mediation he said he thought she was an alcoholic and that he had always thought she was an alcoholic… that he had only had a slight problem with drugs but that she had been drinking heavily every night. Now, I was out there visiting her and she had one little glass of wine with me one night. That was all. He has never mentioned this before. We have never seen her ever drink to excess if at all. It’s just so made up it’s amazing. What he said was that he thought she should take random alcohol tests if he was going to take random drug tests and that she should not drink at all any more. She had no idea how to respond. She doesn’t over drink at all, but if she says, “sure,” then it looks like there is something to prove, but if she says, “no,” then it looks like she won’t give up the booze.

To top it off, he said in court that I was wrong in saying he had stolen money from my mother. He said it was a loan and that my mom would agree to that. I called my mom later and she said she would be willing to make a statement that he had taken it from her account without approval or permission and that when he came months later willing to make restitution, they had agreed that she would call it a loan “without her permission.” I knew that statement would help and my sister-in-law’s lawyers are going to call her tomorrow, but no sooner did I get off the phone with her than my brother called. Now, he hasn’t talked to her in months and all of the sudden he decides to give her a call. She asked him if he knew she was going to make the statement and he said no, that he just had been thinking about her and hoped she was doing all right. He said that his ex-wife was turning everybody against him, etc. etc. By the time he got finished she didn’t want to do the statement any more.

Fortunately she called me and I reminded her of the facts. He had told her that his ex was drinking heavily every night. I asked her how he would know something like that since there is a restraining order out against him and he can’t go near her or the children. She had no idea. He was so full of it… he was like the devil. And as she told me the various things he said, I refuted them, so now she’s willing to make the statement again though she would prefer to back out of it and not do anything. I hope, pray, put my whole heart into it that she will not back out ultimately.

He is such a devil. I’ve never seen anybody (short of violent criminals – which I haven’t really seen, but have read of) who has been as evil as my brother. I say the following because it’s my diary and maybe everyone here thinks I’m screwed up anyway, but sometimes I could almost believe he’s possessed. I made a “joke” tonight at the dinner table about my brother talking to my mother reminding me of the scene in the Exorcist where Linda Blair says, “Dami, Dami, how could you do this to me Dami?” in Damien’s mom’s voice. My husband, who is pretty down-to-earth about these kinds of things said, “I know exactly what you mean. You are right on with that analogy.”

I guess all addicts are possessed in a way. He swears he’s not using any more, but I find that hard to believe since he says he’s out of money now and he just got that $100,000 about two months ago and says he’s only paid his lawyer $3000. I reminded my mom that he hasn’t put one penny forward to support his kids in over a year, not to mention his ex-wife. He also has not worked since 1998. Yet he is so slick, so brilliant, that he’s got the family mediator/social worker practically granting him visitation and he’s managed to stave off the courts until Halloween. What everybody seems to forget it that he once told his daughter that she was the reason he did drugs. That’s a fact. He can’t refute it because they’ve got a letter from him apologizing for that. Yet somehow he can make it all okay by saying he wanted to send her a birthday card but was not allowed to due to the restraining order. Also saying he tried to send her a present via me. His daughter, however, was not interested in receiving any gifts from him. I could go on and on and would except I’ve done that in past entries. I’m just so depressed and sad tonight and feel like there is truly no justice in this world. I considered going ahead with the Celexa, but am still holding off. I think if it weren’t for my husband, I would think all men suck.