October 1, 1992

9:13 pm

It’s late and in 17 more minutes my "Russian Meatloaf" will be done – after 2 hours! K. didn’t really want any, and he’s lucky, because it won’t be ready before he goes. Shithead! K. told me that I talk too much, so that made me decide to not say anything — and for exactly 1/2 hour your’s truly has been quiet. K. says he knows that it’s really hard for me to "shut-up." Fuck him! He’s a quiet one, ain’t he? I picked up that Vogue #1092 wedding dress pattern – it’s absolutely gorgeous – but I got the wrong size! (I got a size #8.) So I called the store and they have a size #12 which they put in a drawer with my name on it/so tomorrow I’m going down to Bangor with Lena. I lost the "battle of wills" with my better 1/2 – as he was leaving I said "goodbye, and have a nice night." Oh well, it wasn’t a bad loss. (It’s nice to be in love!) I talked to Dona Lovely tonight. See, last night I asked Dona to be my "Matron of Honor", but she hasn’t answered me yet. She’s a little wary of her size so she is hesitating a little bit. Which I guess I understand, but I will still be a little hurt if she says "no". But our discussion went into the subject of a reception. It sounds like SO much trouble. I’m already feeling quite over-whelmed with all of this. It seems so simple at times, when I picked up the pattern at the fabric store today, and when we were looking at invitations at a Bridal Shop downtown. (By the by, we found the perfect ones.) They are white with silver roses inlaid, and in the uppermost-middle is our names in pink ($60 for 50 of the suckers!) Anyway, we have to sit down and think about what we want said in the invitations so we can order them at the end of next month. It’s just around the corner! Yikes! Kevin got the loan he applied for at the Credit Union, so in a couple of days when he gets it at the store, he’s gonna pick up my wedding ring set. Tomorrow I am going to call the V.F.W. hall (talk to Lilla Johnson) and see how much it would be to rent the hall for a couple of hours for the reception. If it is way beyond our means then we’ll invite a couple of close friends to a reception at the house. I asked Lena yesterday if she would be my maid of honor and she said yes, Tina Brasier is going to be my bridesmaid, and Joel said he would give me away. I’m gonna save all I can from now on to go towards the wedding. By little by little. (Material for my dress is the most important right now!!!)