July 17, 1992

10:57 am

Well, I’m a divorced lady now! I got the paperwork yesterday. It actually feels no different!

12:23 am

I feel on top of the world! Kevin and I just made love and it was really special. I guess that it really helps that I am not committing a sin anymore, I am a single woman making love with the love of my life. I called the D.H.S., and they told me that the referral I made had been screened and given to the District Attorney, and there IS going to be an investigation. Oh joy. I may have just lost all of my family in one fell-swoop. Some new news; my cousin Robbie from New Jersey called me on Wednesday night (midnight) and he’s coming up to Maine tomorrow. He’s gonna be staying at his mother and father’s house in Machais all of next week. On Monday Kevin is taking me down to see him (Robbie). Because he wants to see ME! Now the jist of this relationship is that I have only seen him 2ce in my entire 21 years. We aren’t even blood relatives – he’s adopted. We got along really well he came up 7 years ago. So, we’ll see. Right? We talked for 2 hours that night, and it was almost like I was talking to an old friend. He says that I am the only cousin that he has that he cares about; and that, despite all the negative shit Mom and Aunt Carol fed him. He knows basically EVERY little god-damned thing about me. I think Maret and Carol were trying to sabotage our relationship. But, if he and I get along superbly, then they are shit out of luck, eh? I’m a little bit apprehensive about this meeting with Robbie, because he remembers the 14 year old, shy and carefree me. What if he hates or strongly dislikes the 21 year old me? with all my baggage and trifles? I just hope we get along good. (He told me that he had a crush on me when we were kids.) In any case, I’m looking forward to Monday.