Perhaps Not

I’ve decided that I don’t really want to do NaNoWriMo this year. I did write about 2500 words on November 1st, but it started off very dark. And thinking about it, I couldn’t see it being anything other than dark. The story I wanted to tell is about redemption, yes, but there’s an awful lot of badness going on before that bit. And it IS the story I want to tell, but it’s not the story I want to be wrapped up in just now. I don’t need that darkness, but there isn’t another story I’d rather tell. I feel like maybe all I’ve got right now is dark. So in the interest of my mental health, I’m choosing to turn on the light.

Halloween and my left-over candy has been killing my diet. I really need to get this crap out of my house. I don’t need it and it doesn’t need to be here. Maybe I’ll hide it away somewhere I’ll never stumble on it accidentally and just give it to Alan when he gets home.

Can you believe he’ll be home this month? Cassie lent me some decorations to put up – all red, white, and blue and stars and flags everywhere. Mildly nauseating but I figure it’ll only be up for a few days. I have to make sure I get it back to Cassie in time for her to decorate for Tim’s welcome home.

In some awesome news, Alan was promoted on the first, so he’s now a Sergeant. Go him! That’s a double bump up the pay scale too, because his 3-year mark was the second. No complaints here.

I finally had an eye exam last Monday and got a new, temporary pair of contact lenses. I have to go back for a follow-up tomorrow, so Pippa is going to Cassie’s house to play with the dogs.They make excellent big brothers. Unfortunately, Pippa never naps when they’re around because she gets so excited. On the plus side, it’s later in the day, so she won’t really suffer from lack of nap, especially if she falls asleep on the way there. Maybe I’ll drive around a bit beforehand so she sleeps in the car. She hasn’t had a terrible adjustment to the time change. She did go to bed early tonight, but I think that had more to do with the fact that she woke up from her last nap at 1:15 and didn’t take another one later in the afternoon. So she was pretty much fried by 6:15 and fell asleep in my lap after one very short story from our book of Greek myths.

I’ve been feeling kind of restless lately. Now that I’ve finished "The Casual Vacancy" I’m finding it hard to focus on books again. I think I need something a bit lighter because that one ripped my heart out and stomped on it until it was ground into the pavement like so much old chewing gum. I sobbed at the end of Part Six…. and pretty much continued sobbing through all of Part Seven (I read straight through) and then for a while after I’d finished the book. It’s not that you don’t see the tragedy coming – you’re sort of dreading it because it seems so inevitable. But there are so many points along the way that it could have been averted somehow. And you want the characters to see that, but you can see that they never will. I’m crying just thinking about it… because they’re so real. They’re horrible and wonderful and real.

Anyway, Pippa’s in bed and I really feel like I should be too. I renew my dieting efforts tomorrow! And maybe we’ll even go for a walk after Pip’s morning nap. I’ve been so bad about exercising lately.

~Liz