Negativity

I’m starting to think that I need to take a break from the internet for a while. Or at least the baby board I’m on. It’s just so rife with nastiness and negativity that I can’t believe these women can claim to call themselves adults.

For example, one woman posted that she was upset by deceptive headers in the posts. I know exactly what she’s talking about too. This particular header was "In tears…" obviously implying that something was wrong and that the poster needed support. When I clicked it though, it was just a gender announcement post. I went back, annoyed that the poster thought it was clever to do that. For one thing, I don’t care about gender unless I know the person because it really has fuck all to do with me. For another, it seems cruel to act like you’re suffering some tragedy… especially when there are women on these boards who have suffered losses. The woman who was upset by this post was annoyed that she had been duped into clicking it when she was trying very hard to avoid gender posts. She’s dealing with some disappointment after finding out the gender and from what I could tell in subsequent comments, it’s because she already has several children of that gender. Anyway, what got to me is how miserably bitchy everyone was to her. They’re telling her grow up, to go to therapy, and basically rubbing in her face how happy they are with the results of their own gender revelations. I could practically hear them shouting "Nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh!"

I’m sorry, but when did it become "grown up" to behave this way? They had no compassion, no kindness for this woman. They don’t know her situation. Maybe she has five boys already and she really wanted a girl this time. Maybe she only found out yesterday so she hasn’t had time to deal with her disappointment. Maybe she has three girls and her husband has been rooting for a boy this whole time and she’s dealing with his disappointment and feeling that she somehow failed him. Again, they have no idea.

Would these women really behave this way in real life? I’m sorry to say that I think they might. Once upon a time, the internet provided anonymity for all sorts of bad behavior. It was a shield from behind which we could say anything, no matter how hurtful or cruel. But it feels like it’s disappearing. That even face to face we’re just as nasty as we are from behind our virtual masks. It’s one thing to speak your mind, but it’s another to hurt someone simply because you can. That’s not adult. It’s the very definition of childishness. Blunt and mean are not the same thing. It’s simply appalling and it makes me want to cut off all ties with the world.

I’m sorry, but I will NOT be raising a "Mean Girl," and I will not act like one until then. I made mistakes in high school and I hurt people. I’m not proud of it, but I sure as hell learned from it. Being strong, opinionated, and empowered doesn’t mean you get to trample all over everyone else.

God, sometimes I really fucking hate people.

~Liz