Crisis of Faith

Is it possible to have a crisis of someone else’s faith?

I’m not even sure right now how the subject came up, but Charlee and I got to talking about religion tonight. I’ve always known that she and Kelby are more religious than us and that they actually attend church on a regular basis, but this is possibly the first time that’s it’s caused any sort of ill feeling. And I imagine that the discomfort is mostly on my side. They go to a non-denominational Christian church. In Connecticut, that’s always meant evangelical Bible-thumpers. Since they tend to be less than subtle, I always thought that Charlee was different… that maybe out here it meant something different. Apparently not. I’m not bothered by the fact that she invited or even encouraged me to go to church, especially considering that I brought it up. What bothered me was the revelation of her attitude towards homosexuality.

I grew up in a socially liberal community. The church I attended welcomed everyone and was very active in community outreach and interfaith missions. Even the stricter religious communities didn’t seem quite so vocal about any condemnation they might feel towards "sinners." A good friend of mine was very active in his Catholic church despite his sexual orientation (he recently married his long-time partner, such things being legal in CT). My mother currently attends a church of the same denomination in Vermont where the pastor is openly homosexual. I’ve always figured that if the Christian God is indeed a God of love, compassion, and forgiveness, surely He wouldn’t condemn a little more love and a little more happiness in the world.

I was a little bit surprised to learn that Charlee takes the view that homosexuality is indeed a sin. I don’t know if she was trying to placate my obvious disapproval, but she says that’s just the way she was raised in her sheltered Baptist bubble. Hate the sin, love the sinner. Homosexuality makes her uncomfortable and I can’t help feeling a little sad at that. Because like I said, could God really condemn a little more love in this world?

The funny thing is that I know she must have seen my rather pagan collection of books. I’ve as much as told her that my beliefs lean in that direction. She didn’t seem to have a problem with any of that. But I worry that her feelings towards homosexuals will cause a problem between us. I’d hate that, because I really like Charlee. I can only hope that her feelings come from her lack of interaction with that community. It seems like the only lesbian she knows may be Kelby’s sister, who apparently is "bi."

I hope religion won’t cause a rift. Charlee is probably the best friend I have out here after Alan.

I think I’ve had too much to drink and I’m just feeling a bit morose. Bed time, I think.

~Liz