im a little happier these days ^_^
Many pressing issues will compete for your attention today. Deal with them now, and you’ll have more time for cultivating new relationships later. It’s not the right time to mix and mingle just yet.
hmm well there are only 2 guys who would possible compete for my attention and they would be the guys im sorta seeing, but yea im gonna have to deal with that today and its going to suck 🙁 and i keep hearing that i should give a guy a chance and only date one guy at a time, but any idea near exclusive or anything serious will not do haha. im freaked out about that. id rather be free right now, be in control of things. i dunno.
last night when trevor and i went walking by the harbor he held my hand and i liked that he held my hand, so i let go…and we didnt say anything about it, but he told me he gets an unsure vibe from me. i just looked at him funny thinking "how does he know?" i dunno one minute im leaning against him and the other minute im sitting on the other side of the couch. i must really be confusing him! haha. im not a flirtatious person either so i dont tell him things like i like him or he looks good or i like spending time with him or anything like that. but he on the other hand is a total opposite! We were driving back from gig harbor and i dont remember what we were talking about but somehow it went to where he said "i like you a lot, and for some reason i cant sum up the reason! i dont really know!" and then when i didnt say anything he kinda thought that maybe it came out wrong and he felt he should find reasons and so he started saying "i dont know, your different from any girl ive ever dated, i really have to work hard to get to know you and understand you when it came easy with other girls and i like it! and you have an innocence to you, i knwo you dont like me looking at you as a goody goody or anything but you do! and on top of that you’re gorgeous you really are…" and i just stopped him there cus i was blushing so much, i told him "trevor its ok you dont need to tell me why you like me its ok ." and he was like "alllright haha" and i didnt have anything to say so i felt stupid. he says all these sweet things and all i can do is blush and look away. he knows im shy and he knows im scared, so i think he knows how to really get to me haha. i dunno. he does get to me. maybe this is waht i needed, someone who would like me enough to really try with me even though im stubborn and not give up. work with me day by day until i warmed up to them. most guys would have given up by now because of my wall. i dunno, i dont know if i like him, i dont know whats going to happen, but i know im a little happier these days ^_^.
well off to do homework!
hanny