dum de da de dum! :-D
my horoscope for today!:
You’re like the ground crew with the orange pointers showing the airplane where to land: grounded, ready for anything and very helpful. You’ll be able to connect with others and find things out, even from a distance.
funny how that is so me….. ANY WHO
today was sunny! and hannah is changing her style once again! i dont know what has gotten into me, but ive started to wear cut-off pants, belts, skirts, and yes, i got the first neclace i ever bought MYSELF yesterday. and i got hats and cute summer dresses! i was never really girly, always a jeans and t-shirts kinda gal, but i think my sister is wearing off on me with her style lol. no mini skirts for me though. i got a few knee length that have lacey designs on them. oh and i got some cute flats, my first pair. i dont know i suddenly had an urge for a change, so now im styling my hair, and wearing cuter clothes, but id still climb a tree any day! im still the same boyish childish hannah lol. so yea, a new change for me. and it feels and looks nice! hmm, yea today trevor and i just drove around and enjoyed the sunshine, went on a few errands and then picked up the girls from the ferry. hes at band practice right now but i think we might for a walk tonight somewhere, i dont know. im still very standoffish because im not used to having a boyfriend and hes fine with that. i mean, we still have a long way to go to make memories and get to know eachother. we both know we will be closer once we go through the rough times. i think the one thing that really scares me is that….well….hes always had sex with most of his girlfriends (i dont know how many yet i havent asked) and what i told him before we started hanging out was " i want to be a virgin till i get married. i dont know if that is going to change or not in the next few years or whenever, but all i know is that is what i believe in right now" but i still cant help but wonder if he will break up with me later because i wont have sex. i know i know, that is a terrible assumption towards my boyfriend, but i cant help it! hes had a lot of sex, and i havent, hes more physical, and im not. i cant help but worry if he will get bored with me if i dont give him what he needs. i guess i will just see as time goes by if he likes me enough to stay with me even if i wont have sex. if he doesnt want to be with me, then i guess he wouldnt really like me for me right? right. i dont know why i worry about these sorts of things. im happy right now and that is all that matters. it just makes me nervous. but oh it gives me shivers down my spine when he kisses the spot in the middle of my upper back, or when he brushes his fingers along my cheek and plays with my hair. i have never felt so important, special, and beautiful like this with anyone. this is what ive missed out on for so long. i hope it lasts and i hope he doesnt get bored of me ^_^
p/s
and no, we havent kissed yet haha