Weekend Plans

Today it was just Tiffany and I, tomorrow is going to be the same way.  I really hate being understaffed like this, and I swear we’re getting more customers now!  Though at the same time, I’m SO glad that Mark is gone!! It wasn’t like he was really that much help anyway!

I might have actually gotten caught up with the orders today, had I not had to re-do about 6 things.  2 from yesterday, where the lady wanted the crappy mat that comes with the frame left in, but didn’t bother telling me that.  2 that had some kind of goober under that glass, so they had to be re-done, and 2 that Tiffany was in such a hurry to get done, she didn’t read all the instructions about the reverse bevels and extra opening for the quote off the card.  ~sigh~  Re-doing things sucks!

I tried calling Kyle tonight, just to talk a bit, let him know I’m not like all shocked and shaken or mad or whatever, and that I wouldn’t mind hanging out with him agian some time.  But he must have been asleep all ready, then I kept waiting for an answering machine, and I probably let the phone ring too long!  Oops!  I probably won’t call him again until Sunday night. Since I’m going to my dad’s this weekend.

I don’t know if I’m really looking forward to it.  See, when my parents first split up, every time I went to see dad, I was so, SO freaked out that he was going to flip out on me and yell at me about the whole thing, I’d be crying every time before I left.  But then, it didn’t happen, so I relaxed, and things were ok, though he was never really happy about the stuff I’d be getting out of his house that mom had left there.  He’d get a little upset about it, but then later he’d just say he was mad at her for putting me in the middle that way.  So I relaxed, and didn’t get all freaked out any more, then, about 2 years ago in September, we had what I thought was a really good night, went out to dinner and I was talking to him, and everything seemed fine.  I did bring up how mom was going to Mexico with her friend, Ned, mostly because I figured if anything were to happen to her while she was there, I’d get yelled at for not telling him. (Catch 22) Maybe a little more info is required here… my dad has always had this temper that seems to pop up at the oddest times, over the dumbest things.  But just wait a few minutes, he’ll get over it and act like nothing happened.  Basically, my whole life the drill was, when he starts getting pissed about something, just keep your mouth shut until he cools down and starts acting normal, then you pretend it never happened. (I will never, never, NEVER date a guy with a temper!!)

Anyway, so that September 2 years ago, everything had been going fine, and I was in the next room of the bar, talking to my friend Clint, and my dad walks in, all pissed, and says, "Are you going home with him or me?"  I’m thinking, HIM! But I know if I do that, things would get worse, so I go with dad.  (Aparently, he was pissed beacuse some guy he doesn’t like at all smacked his ex girlfriends ass or something? I don’t really know or remember.)  Anyway, by the time I get in the truck with dad, I’m crying, because I’m drunk, and he’s pissed, and well, I’m a little scared.  And me crying is a good reason for him to turn his attention (and his anger) towards me.  So for about an hour, I got yelled at about everything, I chose mom over him, I encouraged her to leave him, blah, blah, blah, I’m the worst person ever.  Oh, but he also tells me about all the times he’s held a gun to his head, and I’m the only reason he hasn’t pulled the trigger.  Yeah, always a good thing to tell your kid.  Anyway, eventually, he calmed down, then he cried a lot and said he was sorry.  Since then, I’ve only gone back home twice. 

Actually, the whole thing was really weird, because most of the time, when it’s just dad and I, he doesn’t freak out like that, well, he’s never freaked out that much before, but I mean even in the regular way.  There have been a couple of times that he’s yelled at me becuase he didn’t know where I was, but at least he had a valid reason.  So, it was a really odd thing for him to freak out on me like that.  I think most of the time he doesn’t yell at me because he knows I’ll yell back.  I would have yelled back that time, but I was really drunk, and it sucked becuase all the times I had worried that that exact thing would happened, I’d imagined what I’d say back, and I couldn’t remember any of it. 

He has gotten better though.  He’s been with this lady, Shawna for a couple years now (they got together not too long after all that happened.) and she’s been good at putting him in his place!  So I’ve decided that this year, I’ll try visiting more than once.  If nothing else, I’ll be able to see the rest of my family too!  Oh, and I also have a strict "no getting drunk around dad" policy now.  I’ll have a beer or two, but that’s it.  From now on, I always make sure I’m able to think and take care of myself around him. 

All right, I didn’t mean to get all carried away about all of that.  I kind of wish I hadn’t, cause now I’ve got all this negative energy about every thing!  *boo* I’m sure things will be fine, it’s only going to be like 2 1/2 days, and I think shorter visits are better too, last time I was there for a week, and every day I was just hoping that nothing would go wrong, and I’d be able to go home soon!  I really am mad that I’m having to go through that panic about visiting again!  It’s not so bad now though, mostly because I remind myself that I’m an adult, and I can leave any time I want to.  I have my own car and my own credit cards, I can leave in the middle of the night and rent a room somewhere if it comes to that.  Oh, but I do stay with my friend Katrina when I’m there, so that gets me a little distance from things!

Anyway, I’m leaving when I get off work at 4, then I get to drive 5 hours!  Whee!  Then I’ll be coming home Sunday some time, I’ll try to leave by 1 or 2 so it won’t be too late, and hopefully, I’ll have nothing but nice things to say when I get back!