City Mouse/Country Mouse

First, work was crazy again.  The first couple of hours were ok, then the customers started in one after another, along with the, "is my project done yet?" calls.  A couple of times, I wanted to run away screaming!  Mom dropped by work to say good bye to me, she had a massage appointment.  I told her I really just wanted to take her massage, then go home and drink a bottle of wine!  The one good thing, creepy corporate guy actually referred to me as the manager of the frame shop, rather than the "head of the department" it doesn’t really matter to me, but obviously, to a corporate guy, the difference is vast, so I was amazed! ~L~

The 5 hour drive went well, though I had to stop more than usual to pee, I drank a lot of water this morning!  Now here’s what I wrote in my note book that night:

You know, the one bad thing about having a nice, new suv is that I can’t take it out on all my favorite back roads.  Right now, I’m sitting in my leather interior, as close to the middle of no where as I can get without scratching my paint.  It’s kinda sad in a way.  It’s also sad that I’ve lived in the city too long and watched too many horror movies, and now, I can’t hardly stand out side my truck and enjoy the stars for fear that some I’ll be attacked by a wild animal, or some crazy mountain man (um, who I’m probably related to!)  These are the same woods that I used to happily, mindlessly, drunkenly trip my way through!  I’d go off alone to pee in the dark and never cared!  Now I don’t want to walk more than 5 feet away from my warm leather interior… ~sigh~ I’ve become a city-fied freak!

I should have brought my gun, at least then I’d feel protected from the most likely non-existent wild animals and crazy mountain men!  Then I wouldn’t be so afraid of the dark nothingness of the forest that I used to love so much.  It’s a shame too, because it’s not too cold tonight, it’s perfect weather for laying out a blanket and just staring up at the stars. 

11:30pm back in town, there are no signs of life, everything is closed, I don’t think the bars are even open any more.  I’m tired from working this morning, then driving all the way here, but still, I decided to drive a little more.  No one will want to drive around with me, looking at all the things they see all the time, and I’d get some kind of grief about wanting to do my own thing, rather than hanging out with who ever.  So I drove up to Metaline Falls, another little town about 15 miles from Ione.  It’s more the quintessential little town, main street looks nicer, there are more businesses and it doesn’t look quite as run down.  If for what ever strange reason, I HAD to move back up here, I’d live in Metaline Falls.  The community theater is up here too, the one where I first started doing props and costumes and fell in love with all of it.  I really should look into getting involved with community theater in Wenatchee.

It’s funny, growing up here, everything seemed so boring, yet tonight, there are so many places I’d like to explore again.  Places to visit and reminisce.  Places to take pictures of.  It’s really beautiful up here, I miss the mountains and the tress so much!  Of course, I all ready dropped off my bag at Katrina’s, so I don’t have my camera, though it’s probably too dark to take pictures anyway.  Still, I wish I had it.  I’m getting this strong urge to paint water colors of the views around here… and I’ve never even done water colors before!

It’s midnight now.  I’m back at Trina’s.  I’m tired, but I don’t feel like sleeping just yet.  I’m finally enjoying the beer that I’ve been craving since things started getting crazy at work this morning!  I wish that I could gt on-line and just type all this out.  Well, and I’m getting a strong man-hunt urge again.  I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist for very long.  I should have made myself some kind of objectives during my "I’m not dating!" phase.  I guess mostly, I just keep feeling like I should lose weight first, like for some reason I need to do that before I can be considered acceptable, before I’m able to find someone to love me.  How ridiculous is that?  Really, the only thing I need to do is make sure I don’t compromise, not on what I’m looking for, or on who I am.