Mrs. Noah *

So, I’m married now. It’s a very odd feeling…I’m not at all used to being someone’s wife, and having a different name, and all that.

The wedding was really beautiful, although I had a total freakout when I had a little time to myself right before it. I was all dressed up, with my hair done, and just waiting to go to the ceremony, and suddenly had an "I can’t do this" moment. But then my friends showed up, and we went to the ceremony, and the rest of the day went fine.

I did finally get vows written the day before. I had been looking at websites with examples, and nothing quite felt right, so I decided to just write out a rambly thing, and said that, and it worked fine. And then he said his, which totally made mine look stupid, but oh well. Sometimes it blows me away how much he loves me, even after living with me for a year and a half, seeing all my weird habits and things, that he still sees me as the woman of his dreams.

I know a lot of you think I shouldn’t have gotten married when I’m still in love with Mike. And I don’t really know if I did the right thing. But I know at the ceremony, seeing how Noah looked at me, watching Baby run down the aisle smiling and running straight to her daddy…it felt right, in that moment. It felt like I was giving my little girl the best chance at having a happy childhood, with her family together. And Noah looked really fucking hot in his suit.

We hired a babysitter for the day, even though Baby mostly was around with us, so there was someone always on call to watch her if Noah and I were both busy. I was definitely glad we did that!

After the ceremony, we had everyone over to the house for a kind of picnic style dinner. Thankfully the weather was decent, because there’s no way everyone would have actually fit inside the house. And a couple of Noah’s friends told us their wedding gift to us was that they’d gotten us a nice hotel room (and another room next to it, for one of them to spend the night with Baby), and that they were going to do all the post-party cleaning. Which was very awesome of them. So we got to spend the wedding night in a nice hotel, although we were both really conscious of whether the walls were thin and the friend staying in the next room would hear everything we did. So we had to keep it down a bit, but it was still a lot of fun.

And when we got home, the house was way cleaner than it was even before all the guests showed up. Except they’d put the cups away wrong, but I didn’t say anything about that. 🙂

Yesterday a few friends stuck around for the morning and part of the afternoon, and we opened presents, and just kind of hung out a bit, and didn’t really do a lot. And today, Noah went to work and I’m home with Baby like usual, and nothing feels different at all. Except the name…I’ve had the same name for 28 years, and it completely weirds me out to have a different one.