The great flower saga*

Where to start. I had a message off Danny last weekend. Danny who I broke up with earlier this year after he spent a week telling me he didn’t have time to see me because he was sorting things for his new job, then ringing me after 10pm when he had spent the evening in the pub to see if I would come round to spend the night. Needless to say the answer was no each time.

Anyways, he text me on Sunday telling me he regretted behaving like a dick and causing us to break up. He also said he understood if he didn’t get a reply. Obviously I had nothing to really say, we broke up months ago, I didn’t want to get into a conversation with him, and he was right, he had behaved like a dick. All the replies I came up with in my head made me sound bitter or angry or horrible when really I’m actually just indifferent because I haven’t even thought about him since we broke up.

I assumed that was that. He’d said his piece, I’d ignored it, all was well in the world. But no, on Thursday a huge bunch of flowers and chocolates arrives on the doorstep. My first thought was that they’re from John, seeing as we were both off on Thursday and he knew I’d be off to receive them. The card said ‘to beautiful Jo, for you’. So no clues there.

Awkwardly, the flowers were not from John. He was, however, in bed with me when they arrived. The absolute shame. I then assumed they were from Laura, post wedding, and I’m minding the hamster while she’s on her honeymoon. But no, she reliably informed me they were not from her. So then I thought it must be Danny, and it’s just a bit creepy that he would send something to my house.

We haven’t spoken since we broke up. He has no idea if I have a boyfriend. He has no idea if I’m even still living at home. Plus flowers and chocolates are a pretty expensive gesture to get someone’s attention.

Everyone told me someone would message to take credit before the weekend was out. And lo and behold, today, a message from Danny. Saying he needed to improve himself to prove he was worthy of me, that he hasn’t had a drink for three months, that he misses all these things about me, that he’s thought about me a lot, and that he’s hoping I’ll give him a second chance and we can have a Hollywood ending – yes those were his words, a Hollywood ending! Oh, and he took responsibility for sending the flowers.

I replied saying I’m with someone and I’m happy. He sent a further message saying he’s not surprised, I’m too good to be left on the shelf and I deserve to be happy.

What is with all these boys who think they have some divine right to treat me like crap when we’re together, take issue when I happen to complain that they’re treating me like crap, ending in us breaking up, then realise six months down the line that actually I wasn’t so bad and they’ve made a mistake?!

I happen to believe that people can’t really change all that much. And I don’t tend to give people second chances. I did with Alex and all that happened was he broke my heart twice with all the drug taking and lying. I don’t believe that just because danny’s stopped drinking now, he’ll stay stopped. I do believe that while he might miss me now he doesn’t have me, that in the event he had a second chance, absolutely nothing would be different from the first time round in the end.

It’s all a moot point anyway, I’m so happy with John, I’ve found someone who I do believe appreciates what he has while he has it, and cherishes me.

It’s just a bit of a headwrecker, having someone say those things to you. One of my friends said, I think he’s quite mad, but he’s also lonely and sad and that’s a shit place to be. The more I think about it, they have a point. It is shit to be lonely and sad, but ultimately he brought that on himself when he assumed he could behave in any manner he liked towards me and I’d still be there waiting.

It comes down to that thing again of people assuming because I’m nice I’m a mug. As I always say, I’m a nice girl, I’m not a stupid girl. I shouldn’t be spending as much time as I am thinking about this. Ultimately, had I been single even, I still wouldn’t have gone back there.

Xx