Happy happy happy

Sat in dan’s, drinking all his tea. He is in work and has trusted me to be in his house alone and not snoop. As it happens, I don’t really want to, if I want to know something I’ll just ask the boy!

I swear this boy gets sweeter by the day. I’m kinda scared to rave about him in case it jinxes things, I know it’s really early days but it’s going well, he seems to really like me and actually wants to spend time with me which is a novelty. He’s quite happy to sit and tell me how amazing I am too which again is quite a novelty. He’s told all his friends about me, he’s told his family about me, he’s been to my house and eaten tea with my mother.

Basically he’s proud of having me as his girlfriend. I can’t remember the last time I could say that about anyone. He loves me, and I know it, I can see it and feel it in everything he says and does. This is a boy who would do anything for me, and I’m now old and sensible enough to know better than to take advantage of that.

I can’t believe I knew this boy ten years ago and was stupid not to realise who he was. He said last night he can’t wait to prove to me who he can be. I think the fact he has kids and isn’t with their mum still is something that bothers him. It wasn’t his choice, she walked out on him, it was a suitable amount of time ago for him to be over it in respect of he doesn’t want her back, but I think the situation bothers him. He’s a good guy. He told me that he wants to do things properly. It’s definitely not something we should have talked about at this early stage in our relationship but I think we decided early on that we liked each other a lot so the whole kids thing had to come up. I didn’t want to get in a situation where we were together six months, madly in love, then we talked about it only for me to find out he wouldn’t want more kids.

As it happens it’s all good, he’d have more kids. The only thing he’s bothered about is someone tricking him by getting pregnant on purpose. Basically it’s what happened with his first baby, the mother is older than him and got pregnant on purpose without discussing it with him. Aside from the fact it’s something I’d never do, a baby should be born from love not resentment and trickery in my eyes, I joked that I’m a safe bet for two more years cos I have the implant and he’d definitely notice if I had that whipped out!

This is the boy I think. There’s something about him that makes me think this could be the one that sticks. I feel like I can be totally myself around him, it’s like hanging out with my best mate, being silly, but with a whacking great dose of lust and passion thrown in. I can’t physically be in the same room as this boy and not touch him. Thankfully he’s a hugger too so it’s fine!

He wants an actual relationship. He wants me. And I want him too. When does that ever happen?!

Xx