Did ya miss me~~

Now be honest with your answers..lol. Its all good. I took a leave of absence. Well not really, just have had so many things that I have been doing, that I have managed to neglete my poor diary..No one reads it any ways..lol  Its all good. A while back, I said I was going to tell it all, but unlucky for you, I didn’t quit know what all was. I was thinking about doing a Jp bio, but I decided against it. So instead, I will leave that one for later later…Like everything else, too much of a good thing…So lets see where do I sit about not. Actually I am in bed, on the laptop so that xplained that. This might be a long entry, so make sure you have the popcorn and soda beer whatever it is you drink ready. Its been a while, and I guess I have so making up to do. Listing to the new/old Linkin Park CD, Minutes to Midnight, so bear with me, if I start signing out loud…lol. So where to begin…

I got my Desert Eagle in finally, after months of asking for it. Actually, not asking for it, but waiting for someone else to place a pistol order, so I could split the shipping charges. With gas an all, and the fact that firearms have to be shipped next day, cause they can’t be sitting around in a hub somewhere, shipping charges are high. So who comes to the rescuse, MySpace. The kid got himself a firearm. I was like Dennis, the boss, I told him what in the blue hell are you thinking. He was like dude, if he can pass the background check, then he is good. I was like alright, but just so you know, the kid is a little mental. He was like oh well will see. He didn’t get delayed on the background check, but he did have to go into further review. Sad part is, I got the same. But since I keep and have a low profile, I am sure the TABC/FBI was wondering who is JP and how come we don’t have nothing on him..lol. Anywhom, back to the Desert Eagle. For those that didn’t check out the link, he is a quick run down. Desert Eagle is a firearm of course, and it is the standard military issue of the Isreali Military. They are made in Isreal, and they are said to be one of the highest ranked guns in accuracy. Now, I managed to get the Baby Eagle, cause the standard full size one, is about 1200 dollars, and well I don’t have that kinda money just laying around, and the boss said I couldn’t use a credit card. So I opted for the "son" and let me tell you, its a bad MF. I opted for the nine millimeter, cause I was trying to keep ammo cost down. I did ask some questions, people said to go with a .40 or a .45 cal. but I was like na. They said it has greater knockdown power than the nine. I mean I didn’t xactly get it for self defense I just wanted a "toy". So I went with the nine. It would have been the same price in the other two calibers, so there wasn’t much of a change there. What sold me, was the fact that it had a sixteen round clip. So basicly 17 shots, including the one in the chamber. If I can’t get you with 17 shots, oh well. Took it out at the ranch and unlessed some hell. Its too sweet. Went thru 30 rounds and didn’t jam once. Barrel got a little hot, but that is the norm. I am happy to say the least. And the fact that I got it 120 dollars under retail value, can’t beat that. One of the perks of working in a sporting good store…I will try to get pictures..but that will be later later…Maybe…

These last two weeks, I have been working with my boss after hours plumbing a house. Its a new structure, and that is one of the reasons why I haven’t been around. We get out of work at 5-30 and then got to work from six till nine. SO not much time to do anything. It great getting twenty bucks an hour, so I can’t complain. We finally got done today, all that is left tomorrow is just to go and do some cleaning. But since he dosen’t have to work tomorrow, he volunterred to go and clean up the mess we did. The cut pieces of pipe, and all the rest of the "mess" me made. It was all good. So we did what is called a "rough" in plumbing job. Just basicly getting water to where it needs to be. If the owner of the house likes what we did, he might call us in to install the fixtures and toilets once they get the sheet rock up. But then again, he might say you are fired pay us, and that be the end of that. In any way shape or form, I am still going to get my money..lol. So yeah that was that…

Other than that, my life has been the same. We caught a little bit of rain from Dolly yesterday, but it wasn’t nearly enough to get the ground wet. I mean I feel for the people that might have died, if any, and the people that might have lost thier home or got flooded, but dude we need the rain. It is soo damn gone dry out here, that I wouldn’t mind ten or fifteen inches of rain. So if you have any that you can spare, please send it down here. Ok, I know that is asking too much, so that will be left at that..

Talked to Promise the other day, told her I was going to take a three day weekend in August, and am going to go down there and visit. I will finally be able to meet someone, that I meet online. I have one more to go, but that is a touchy subject so I will leave it at that. She called me the other day, just out of the blue, and we kinda started talking again. We ended up in such a bad way, that her call caught me by suprise. Oh well, I guess good things do come back after you lose them. I was looking foward to taking a whole week off, but the boss is being a penis, so I have to reschedule  my vacations for another time. Instead I will work my monday which I have off, for the saturday, and take off firday night. Then I come back on tuesday and work till saturday. I still have my plan ticket on hold. So its not out of the woods just yet. I am looking foward to going to the coast. It will be so nice to get out and about. I think I need it, more than I deserve it. Not only that, but to finally meet Promise. She did say though, that she was going to kick my ass, for all the BS I have put her thru over the years. Needless to say, it should be intresting. I wonder how it will turn out. The xcitment, and anticipation of meeting after all these years, I am going to let it kill me and torture me all that it wants. Not wanting to sound like an item on a list of things to do, but I will be good to finally have meet her. If only it was D instead. But that would be like comparing apples to oranges….

Me and D have resumed talking. It was rough let me tell you. And I am sure there are are some people who have read my diary, that are shaking thier heads and calling me a dumbass.  Its fine, cause I probably am. I have read some entries, and have thought to myself dude that is so messed up. But I have also learned that until you are in thier shoes, or are going thru what they have been, you will never ever understand. Yeah, it seems easy always to say dude get over it and move on. I have a times told myself that I need to leave it all behind me and move on. But I just can’t. I probably could, but I choose not to. If I have to cry myself asleep at nights, while I replay what I said to her in my mind just to go to sleep so be it. I did wrong, I know, and well no body to blame put me. Its the fact that after you say something out of anger or rage, and when the blood stops boiling and you start piecing things together and realize that what you did was so wrong,

and you have the evidence that proves it, that you realize how dumb and ignorant you were, that it finally hits you that you were wrong. That my friends is the case with me. I wrote her an e-mail one time, which is stil saved in my pc, and i read it from time to time. IN that e-mail I said the good, the bad, and at the end I told her how I was so wrong. I will ask for permission to post it on here, and then you will really see how I have not been the victum in all these. I guess I just wanted you people to think I was the one that was done wrong. But needless to say, I have realized that I was wrong, and I am now working on trying to make things seem like they used to be. I know that once something happens and things fall apart, that they can’t be quiet the same again. Kinda like a broken china plate, once you glue it back it will still be round and white, but when you look close enough you will see the the fracture lines. The worst feeling of all, was when I basicly ran her off of OD. It was never my intention, and it was not what I was trying to do. But that is what she did, and I miss reading about her daily adventures. ***The only thing that is worste than one is none**** So like I said, I am slowely but surely trying to fix what I broke. I hope it all turns out the right way, but for now, I am glad that we are atleast talking. I saw the skies dark, when she stopped talking to me. I mean four more months and it will be a year that we have been talking, so I don’t want to ruin it…

And that leaves me to the end. I am still undecided in what I want to do with my future. I hate to just be wasting my time here when I could be doing other things. But is it wrong, when you are doing something and you feel so right so comfortable so good, that you don’t want to change it, cause its to right? I don’t know. I;’ll just have to wait and see what is in store for me. Tomorrow is another day, and I have got to get some zzzz. SO thanks for reading, and I will see you in another month..lol. Just kidding, the adventures are only beginging. IS that the way you spell it..oh well you know what I meant. Take care and till then…

Jp