I am a slacker

 I never update. It’s not that my life isn’t update worthy as  of course, it is. But I just don’t find the sweet release as often as I would like to.

Went back to work after a 2 week bout of bed rest, but I am only working four days now instead of six a week, and that is a huge pay cut in my already measly makings. I have found a friend in Jessica, one of my bosses, who actually sits in the cubicle next to me. I feel that I never expected a connection between the two of us because A she is 40, and B she was very intimidating when I first started and I didn’t know if I would like her or not. She was going thru battling breast cancer, but she is successfully in remission at the moment, and I have found her to be an amazing support system and offerer of advice and insight as well though all that I am going through.  I asked her once if she had ever wanted to have kids, and I brought her to tears, because apparently that was a wish she had but wasnt able to fulfill with her life. While I wish I would have kept my mouth shut, I felt almost like I related to her in a way emotionally that no one else had, and I felt honored in a way.

Sounds silly, I just think she is a great person and she has been downplayed a lot in what life has offerred her. We would def get along outside of work, and I plan to  hang out with her sometime after I am pregnant. 

I think the only reason I have not been fired from my job is because I am pregnant. I am by no means bringing them big money, and even thought I’m definitely  trying my best, it just doesnt seem like I am cut out for sales over the phone.  I would give anything to go back to dancing, I miss it so much…well, not maybe the whole being an exotic dancer part as much as being so string, and good at something i loved so much..thats the POLE!

 I cant wait to start re training myself on the pole. I know that it will be frustrating since my muscles have dissappeared and the fat has gathered lol…and  I will have to start from scratch…but it will be SO worth it. There has never been a better feeling for me than when I was improing and learning and mastering tricks on the pole. I would do anything to be back at least where I was….

Well, I have a doctor appointment tomorrow, probably just some bogus prenatal check up again that I will have to sit through, for nothing..since the baby is fine and active. ugh. 6 Weeks and baby Brendon David Tiffany will be here. HURRY BRENDON HURRY! mommy wants her body back!!