Gypsy

The wind calls to me…

I never felt settled. I seemed to always be at unease. Not at home. I have childhood friends who remember how much I talked about being somewhere else. The gypsy in me had always run strong.

I was determined to head to California for college. Then I met a college professor during a high school activity and I knew it was that college I had to go to. I didn’t even bother applying anywhere else, and so I stayed in the Midwest. And I know that chapter of my life belonged there.

After college, I was living at home, working two jobs, and saving my money just to move West. It was not a healthy desire. I was obsessed with escaping. Leaving a life behind and becoming someone else. Escaping is never the answer. Then I met my l-ve, so I stayed in the Midwest. And I know that chapter of my life belonged there.

We made a life together. We rode the roller coaster. I slowly started seeing parts of myself. Yet I was never settled. I paced. I found new things to do. When that was not enough, our living space was constantly being rearranged. And I knew I no longer belonged there.

So, we sold almost all of it, threw the rest into storage, and hit the road. I was no longer escaping. I was exploring. I was on a journey of finally finding me. For 15 months, we drove the country. We spent a month at almost every stop. We explored and my spirit felt free. I was a gypsy without a home. Loving each stop, making new connections, but growing no roots. A few days before the end of each month, the wind would blow and I was anxious to move on.

Each place played a critical role in the chapters of my life. Pieces scattered everywhere as if parts of me floated down from the sky. I found them, picked them up, and found their place. The fire grew behind my eyes. My gypsy leading the way.

The winds finally died down and I knew it was time to find some roots. For the first time in my life, I no longer feel unsettled. I am embracing myself. I fell in love with the mountains, so I stayed out West. And I know that this chapter of my life belongs here.

How long will the winds stay calm? I do not know. They will blow again….one day. For now, I have a found a home where I want to stay for awhile. I am not looking out the window wondering where the next stop is.

Connect. Build. Grow. Allow to be influenced while influencing. Lessons to learn. Lessons to give. Life is about giving as much as taking. Life is about the friendships and loves we create. The experiences we chose to embrace. Creating our unique tapestries.

I will embrace each moment for its importance and lesson. Not wanting to take it for granted. I will watch myself continue to grow. To strive to always stay in the present.

Until the wind blows again…

“All my life I’ve always come back to one thing,
my need to feel free and the need to feel the breeze,
the ride provides a freedom this gypsy needs,
where every road is another blessed memory,
a new experience to carry inside my journey,
a sense of belonging to a familiar tribe,
a brotherhood that goes beyond a bloodline.”
― Jess “Chief” Brynjulson, Highway Writings