The end of an era

Well, me and Brent broke up today! But luckily I wasn’t mean and it was a mutual thing.. basically the circumstances were really putting stress on us and screwing up our relationship. . he said he still loves me and all this shiznit. Of course I still love him, and I always will..even with all the shit we’ve been through.. Once your with someone for that long you can’t just let go.. He still wants us to talk and everything but I dont think we could be very good friends right now.. there’s too much that was there before. At least I got out of it, I guess, and I dont have to constantly worry about him anymore. Sometimes its just hard to believe it’s over tho. We’ve been through so much together and he was one of the few people in my life that I actually opened up to and felt comftorable being myself around.. I dont know if I can be his friend right now. I really did and do love him tho, no matter how bad I have talked about him sometimes.. You’d have to see the side of him I usually saw to understand.. he is one of the sweetest guys on this earth.. he always made it known that he loved me and that I was everything to him..he would always put me before anything else when we were together.. he would make me breakfast, and dinner and all that.. he thought it was necessary to always get me things like stuffed animals and flowers and cards, and everything..Oh well, I guess I cant dwell on the past.. I just hope I wont completely lose touch with him.. I know he still loves me.. the situation about us hardly ever getting to talk or see eachother was way too hard.. I just hope he’s happy and maybe someday the situation could be right for a relationship like ours. I’ll always love him, but I know things are better off this way.. People probably have made judgements about him.. but you’d have to see the person that I have seen in him for the past year and a half to feel my pain. I know the pain will go away, and I will be better, and I will find another guy who can treat me just as well, if not better. And I know finding another guy won’t be extremely hard. But I think it’s better for me to deal with this now than to bottle it inside..well theres not much I can do except deal with the necessary pain and then to move on with my life.. I know I’ll be happy.. and I know when I’m older I’ll look back on this relationship and remember all the sweet times we shared, even tho it hurts now.. but i guess it’s all for the best.