Let’s do this thing***

I can’t believe it’s December! Man, if I were still in school I’d be preparing (probably last minute) for final exams. College feels so recent but at the same time I feel like I’ve changed since then. Moving across the country alone and having a job I enjoy probably has something to do with that. I’ve gathered some good ol’ life experience points, that’s for sure.

I know I still have growing up to do, and can’t imagine handling the responsibility some people take on at my age (when my mom was my age she already had 3 kids, for instance). That requires a kind of strength I can’t really imagine, that’s for sure.

I’m not really sure why I’m updating again… I have really only eaten dinner and watched some TV with Meghan since the last time I wrote. I guess I’m realizing how much I really depend on my diary emotionally… I’ve had it for almost 7 years, and it definitely keeps me connected with my friends. Plus I usually browse the website if I’m bored or in a bad mood… things are put into perspective when I read other diaries and realize that everyone basically goes through the same situations, and that we’re a lot alike inside of our heads. Plus I spent the entire day resting, so I have all of this energy with nothing to do. It’s dark and cold outside! ::sigh:: E got the whole having-conversations-with-zombies idea stuck in my head now, so I don’t want to wander around the park alone. I’m just not ready for that conversation, E. I’m not ready.

I’ve really been thinking about putting together my own philosophy. I have read 2500 years worth of other peoples words, and know the things I agree with. I am still struggling with it though, because I really try to avoid making absolute statements..well, at least as far as "truth" is concerned. There are certain moral/social questions I won’t budge on (fear not! I’m not completely wishy-washy).

Question: Am I really the only person I know scared of things that aren’t real? I’ll be quick to admit my fear of zombies and the Grinch cartoon (or any Dr. Suess or "Triplets of Belleville" style animation), but I don’t hear any of this kind of stuff from other people.

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What are you guys scared of? I mean, aside from the usual "dying alone" or "heights" or whatever. I won’t exploit you after you tell me, I swear! 

Anyway, I guess I should try to sleep sometime in the next 2 hours. Gotta get up early for a couple of tree plantings tomorrow.