I’m in a strange mood

An entry with some pics is one back if you’re bored.

I’m not working today. I don’t know if it’s the time of year, something hormonal, or whatever else, but for the past few nights I’ve been having dreams filled with the beginning of new relationships and the work involved with maintaining romantic relationships. The annoying thing about these dreams is that they’re needlessly long, detailed and coherent. Like, Renee is bugging me to go on a field trip to Dolly World with her, and Renee tells me that the guy I’ve recently started dating (who I used to go to college with) is feeling insecure, so when I see him later I tell him that I heard he was feeling bad and was concerned, but not too concerned because I didn’t want to appear obsessive, blah blah blah. It was really dragging on. My subconscious needs better things to do.

But yeah. I wonder where I’ll have to hang out to find a cool new dude that might want to hang out with me. I know I have two guy friends that have basically always liked me, but… no. I’m just not feeling it. Maybe some guy will come to the nature reserve and we’ll start up a conversation about Kids in the Hall skits or learning how to beatbox or scary animals that live deep in the ocean. Yeah, that’s always a possibility.

Today’s my mom’s birthday. I think she’s finally turning 29. I’ll have to call her later to harass her, and maybe see if there’s anything celebratory I can do once I finally get paid.

I am technically supposed to receive my first paycheck today, but I don’t want to use gas to drive the 30-ish miles roundtrip to pick it up when I’ll be working there on Monday anyway. I work at the other park tomorrow and Sunday, and I’m trying to see if someone can take my check to the other park for me; if not I’ll just have to wait until Monday. My dang direct deposit doesn’t start until my next paycheck. Woo, boring paragraph!

Have you lived somewhere when you were younger and then returned to visit several years later? Last week I visited a place I lived at during 4th, 5th and 6th grade. It ended up being depressing and scary in some weird way, because I couldn’t distinguish whether the things I felt when I saw certain things (the playground at the middle school, the empty lot across from the house I used to live in, etc.) were from actual memories or scary dreams I had about those places.

It’s a little difficult to describe, but I felt like I was haunting a place where I didn’t belong.

I have been looking into AmeriCorps programs for next year and submitting my application to some places. I’ll be sure to update on that more when I hear back from them. I like knowing that I can basically move wherever I want, but I think I’d like to stay on the eastern half of the country. I guess things are cool out west, but it seems that there’s just so much empty space between Nevada and Illinois.

Anyway, enough of this for now.

In other news, I want to learn this song in the New Year. Maybe find a rappin’ buddy and crash some talent competition or karaoke night. Oh, dreams.