TOO FUNNY NOT TO SHARE – ok

To funny not to share
1/13/2005

I recevied this from my lunch buddy today and found it to funny not to share

 

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Have  you noticed that Stairs are getting steeper. Groceries are heavier. And,  everything is farther away.. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was  dumbfounded to discover how long our street had  become!

And,  you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They  speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep  repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until  they’re red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I  also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other  hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old  friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn’t even  recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was  combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own  reflection……… Well, REALLY NOW- even mirrors are not made the way  they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast today!  You’re risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the freeway in  front of them.. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast,  the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view  mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why  else would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20?  Do they think no one notices that these things no longer fit around the  waist, hips, thighs, and bottom?

The people who make bathroom  scales are pulling the same prank, but in reverse. Do they think I  actually "believe" the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let  myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they’re  fooling?

I’d like to call up someone in authority to report what’s  going on — but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they’ve  printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a  number in here!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are  under attack! Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will  have to suffer these awful indignities.

 

 

 

 PS: I  am sending this to you in a larger font size, because something has caused fonts to be smaller than they once were too!

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