I REALIZE

I realize that I am unfriendly and a bitch most of the time. Maybe I shouldn’t say bitch but I certainly do not get on well with people.

For example over the last years:

I don’t talk to one friend because she got on my nerves. She kept badgering me about always wanting to start with HARD crafts instead of building up slowly. She  complained that I worked too fast etc. I told her off. I told her that just because she works slowly as other people it doesn’t mean I have to. I work fast and so what. That’s the way I do things and it’s ok. By the time some people get out of bed I could have all my cleaning and cooking done.

One friend was a bastard when he played bridge. After a few years of taking his crap I told the group I wouldn’t play with him anymore. He was so upset when we made a mistake. PLEASE! Hubby told him why we wouldn’t play with him anymore. He doesn’t want to be friends. OK! Your loss!

Another friend I will still talk to but our relationship is NOT what it was. She is the one who lost her husband and is now going out with my other friend who lost his wife. I call her every few weeks and so far she has never called me. What’s up with that? She’s in Ottawa and when she comes to Montreal she never calls.

An old neighbour has called a few times since we moved but I never return her calls. Maybe I’ll see her at shul. I sound just like my hubby! We never had much in common. Our daughters were friends when they were very young.

Anyhow in a way I feel bad but I am who I am. I know I have to be careful with people. Actually I am very NICE. I play Canasta with a group of elderly women and I am very friendly and warm even when they aren’t.

I was in bed but woke up after an hour.

Tomorrow starts YOM KIPPUR! Hubby got an honour to open the ark tomorrow night. We weren’t planning to go to the synagogue but I told him we should if the grandchildren would come. Otherwise I told him to try to change it to Wednesday. I am sure he won’t. The grandchildren would be thrilled to go up to the ark with their ZAIDY. I don’t know why he doesn’t show any CARING and or love towards them. He is such a COLD man. Of course I have known this for many years. I don’t know what made him like this. I told him it’s up to him as it’s his birthday tomorrow. 76! He also wants to walk to shul when we go. Last holiday I told him I found it too hard to walk. I am not sure what we will do. Maybe I’ll drive over alone………………….
I went to the eye doctor today. All is great.
Still have to go to the neurologist for a checkup. I will tell him I’ve been getting headaches – not lingering but just an ache now and then.
Still have to go to the dentist.
Still have to go to the periodontist to check my gums.
Still have to go to my GP and get a blood test. I will tell her about the funny feeling in my foot.
Still have to go to the doctor who did my colonoscopy. My appointment is November 14. I am hoping my GP will be able to check the results as they work in the same hospital. If not I’ll stick around. I don’t care. If it was up to me I would stay until after the Bar Mitzvah in Toronto at the beginning of December. It would save money and I am not in any rush to go even though I have a good time. I just have a hard time changing my environment all the time.
Will probably go to the dermatologist to get checked over. OY! It will such a relief to get into the car and leave for Florida.
Tomorrow I will stay home. I will do the WII instead of swimming. I will prepare supper – stew, vegetable soup all ready, and maybe some roast chicken. We will eat at five and then start fasting. I will probably cheat and drink water during the day. Actually because I am diabetic I don’t have to fast but I always did.
I must go find and sign my hubby’s birthday card.
Today was my son’s first anniversary. I emailed to see if they are available to go for supper next weekend. 
The weather is changing. The leaves are falling. I am happy it’s not so hot anymore.
I went to Walmart today and bought two pair of jeans. I have been looking forever for a light pair of jeans. Most are so heavy! Now I have to get them shortened.
I also bought some sweaters because I don’t have any but have to bring them back. They don’t look good at all.
So that’s all folks.