The Goings On 05.04.2012
Housing – We are in a last ditch attempt for the house we have our eye on. We thought we might get a decent loan, but that’s not the case with Wells Fargo or BECU. Our Real Estate agent gave us information on a Mortgage Broker and she was confident she could find something for us. If we don’t end up getting this, we’re all ready to accept that Apartment living is in our future. We’ll still move south of Seattle. We will save some money. We will both find jobs that we can settle into long term.
Children? – A few times Twin has asked me if I want to start a family now. I say no. We’re getting close to that, but these are concerns still:
1. It would be nice to own a home and had the time to make it our own. I’ve talked about a place to live being a long term commitment even for the Gemini we are. Its nice to put effort into other endevors and not moving around to different places (We have experience with moving 5 times in a year). It would be tough to do all of that while raising a newborn or toddler.
2. Although I have grown jaded to playing video games in all of my spare time, I would like to get into a habit of reading books in the evening. I have a number of books I would like to read already. That would be mainly to exercise my curiosity, then increase my reading speed so I would have opportunity to read books for expecting parents and child-development books there-after.
3. Related to the point above, I still have some psychological quaalms about raising my own kids. I know my kids won’t feel neglected, but I also want to groom them to be more social than myself *edit – help them be more social, placing them in social situations and getting them involved in coversations among adults while they’re still young. That wasn’t something my parents really did. My fundamental approach is I can’t make them be anything and that I want them to be themselves*. Twin and I only have a handful of friends that we visit infrequently. It would be nice to strengthen those bonds. I may have to conquer some Avoidant-Attachment tendencies, and Twin might have to deal with the same thing along with body-image related issues. As a side note, it may be my inability to plan anything that plays the biggest obstacle to distance between me and friends, but again that may be made possible by the Avoidant-Attachment issues.
I think that’s about all there is to update. Tonight, if the rain will let up we’ll get active. Tomorrow we will likely celebrate Cinco de Mayo with Twin’s family. There is a Sounders FC game at 1:30. The real activity is next weekend, where we’ll be attending the Maritime Festival in Seattle for the Tugboat races. We’ll be out there in our kayaks to watch. Hopefully the weather is nice.
Fun weekend! Also, very well thought out issues on the child raising, etc. Though I dont know if you can raise a child to be more social or not.. I think its just something you are or are not.
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Saw you on the front page! I agree with above, not sure if one can raise a child to be more social or not. Some are just born introverts. But putting them in social situations as often as possible would go a long way to helping them develop those skills. Have a great weekend!
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I think the goals you have for your kids is a good one. Ironically, this will mean you will have to find a way to be social. Unfortunately, kids tend to model behavior. granted, they will come with their own temperament and proclivities because of it.But if you want them to be social, you will have to teach them that not with words but with actions.
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I think your kids will learn to love being outdoors cus you and twin do, but the social part youll have to overcome in yourself in order to teach them by example. If i learned anything with the mistakes i made with my own daughter, is that action is more important than lectures. Though the lectures are important in examples of HOW they should think, not what they should think…good luck
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I hope you get it! Buying a house is SO exciting!! We found out we were entitled to $375,000 from our mortgage broker before we even started looking for a house. It made things SO much easier! 🙂 Plus with the sale of my condo and Steve’s house we put down $68,000 to bring our mortgage down a huge chunk too! hehe Yeah man.. kids would def keep you busy! I quite like playing video games WITH my son and reading books WITH my daughter… you really do adapt!
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Man, a loan is a hard thing to deal with these days. It would be nice to have a home for children and not sustain life in an apartment. But, that being said, I do wish the absolute best for you. Your honest notes about your concerns are genuine. Give great consideration to those while discussing this with your gal. They are from your heart.
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ryn: I would also be very happy if the rosebud code worked in real life lol. There is no slowing down for me, I love my social life and it is one of my meters 🙂 This is why I know I’m not ready for kids yet, I’m young and I’m not ready for that kind of responsibility yet. In a year or two, we’ll see how things are. I don’t want to wait too much longer than that though.
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