Random

Of course when OD is down I feel like I have a million things to write and now that it’s back I can’t remember any of it, lol.

Emily is doing great, but she had a tough sleep week. The week before it was taking forever to bounce her to sleep, but that got much better and I’m spending the regular amount of time now..sometimes only 15 minutes! But she’s waking up almost an hour early in the mornings for some reason. It’s not a huge deal because I’m awake and getting ready for work anyways, but I want her to get enough sleep. It’s teething. She’s got two coming through on the top (the tip of one finally just broke through) and the molar on the bottom right is taking forever to work its way up. She slept in this morning though, so I think they’re starting to feel a little better.

She’s been talking and talking and talking lately! She loves the Toy Story movies a little too much me thinks though. I think she has it memorized, lol. She’ll say a word in the movie right before they say it! Like if they’re about to say “no”, she yells “NOOO!!!!” lol! Right before people/toys get a hug in the movie, she says hug. If they’re about to show a train, she goes “Choo, choo!” She’s so stinking cute. Not to mention she says Woody (Woo-ee), Buzz, Hugs (Lotso the bear), Barbie and Ken. When Rex comes on she roars, lol. I think it’s interesting that she can say the word “claw” perfectly. You would think the c-l beginning would be hard! When the little aliens say “The claaaw” she goes “claw! Claw!” hehe. She is so stinkin cute. I’ll let her watch it for a little while after I get home just so I can sit down a minute and get dressed into something comfy, but then I try and keep the TV off as much as possible since she probably has full-access all day. She doesn’t seem to care when you turn it off at least. She loves playing and ready and running around.

I have had massive baby fever the last few weeks, and then I realized that this is my last cycle before we TTC!! That happened pretty quick, actually! My cycle is still a little wonky, like it’s always been. I ovulate pretty late, like between CD 19 and 23, and then my period is usually more like CD 35. *shrug* It doesn’t really matter to me as long as I ovulate. I conceived Emily on CD 22 or 23 I believe, so whatever works! I’m thinking that means mid-January is go time. SO EXCITED. The only problem is I will be really disappointed if it doesn’t happen January or February. In fact, if it doesn’t happen then I will probably skip March because I don’t want a Christmas baby. My birthday is nine days after Christmas and it always sucked when I was younger because some people would just give me an “extra” present at Christmas and say it was for my birthday. I don’t give a crap if I get anything now, but I remember being annoyed at that when I was young, lol. Stupid reason, but I’m still stickin to it.

I’m afraid I’m a little over confident that it’s going to happen January or February though! I got pregnant so quickly and easily after my first surgery and then we got Emily on the first try too, so I hope it’s the same. I figure, after everything I went through to be able to get pregnant and have a baby, I should at least be rewarded with quick and easy conception, lol. I keep thinking how much I miss feeling a baby inside and all those exciting moments, like finding out the gender (which we’re going to do a cake reveal next time! Eee!!), decorating the room, etc. I’ve gotta tell you though, it’s already like 100% in my mind that the next one will be a girl, lol! I just love having a little girl and when I dream of the future I always imagine myself having three girls..so I will be extremely excited. =) But of course who doesn’t want a boy and a girl also. I will just be shocked if it’s a boy. We’ll have to have someone record the moment when we cut the cake open and find out the gender because that would be a funny reaction! =)

You know what’s strange though? I forget what it’s called, but I still get the sensation of baby kicks. Like phantom kicks or something. I never had them before I was pregnant and it feels exactly like a baby kick. I googled it and the consensus is it’s probably gas or something, but I’m not gassy and I never had them before so I don’t know why it would feel that way now. Oh well..it doesn’t bug me, but sometimes it makes me miss being pregnant even more. =)

And for some damn reason I can’t seem to go past nine days on my juice fasts! I wanted to go right up to the Christmas party this Thursday, but I caved a few days ago and it’s been downhill since. Then yesterday and today they celebrated someone’s birthday at work and it’s been non-stop cheese and crackers and cake and crap. Ugh. I find it interesting that I lost 11 freaking pounds on my first fast and lost ONE pound on the second. How depressing, lol. Nine days of not eating to lose one measly pound?! I know, I know..I did it to feel good. But I’ll honestly admit I sort of felt depressed this time around too! I don’t know what was up. I felt good like Day 4, had the juice high I was longing for, but after that I just felt down and not me. It wasn’t enjoyable. I’m over the funk now though.

My stomach is back to being huge and bloaty again, *le sigh*. Right in time for our pictures this Saturday. Oh well. On the plus side, I bought a dress for our Christmas party and it’s a SIZE 6! I was in my very early 20s the last time I probably fit in a Size 6. I don’t know why, but even when I’m wearing it I look like a large person to myself though. I don’t know if it’s just low self-esteem or I don’t like my body type or what it is. Bryan usually makes me feel worse about it. Last week when I was still on the fast my clothes were pretty baggy but it was okay. I actually got a very nice compliment from a very attractive man at work, so I was feeling pretty good about myself! The next morning Bryan says “Oh, you look much less frumpy today.” Excuse me? You thought I looked frumpy yesterday? Who am I kidding though, he thinks I look like shit every day. Then yesterday I tried on the new dress in front of him and I guess I was compliment seeking and said “I just feel like my gut looks huge in this and I feel fat..” and he just looks at me and looks away, doesn’t say anything. Ugh. End of ridiculous pity party. =)

Work has been a breeze this week. We didn’t get a trial yesterday or today so I’ve just been sitting in my office working on transcript and BSing with people. My judge and law clerk were in my office for almost two hours yesterday just talking about movies, lol. It’s always super easy in December. I love it. And I get the whole week of Christmas off, which I’m really looking forward to! I just realized another reason I really want to conceive in January or February…if I don’t, I will have to take the week of Christmas off again next year and that’s a week I’ll lose in maternity leave a short while later.

Bryan is on winter break from teaching right now, but he volunteered essentially to do this project from 5pm-9pm every day. We don’t need the nanny at least, but I’m essentially working a fulltime job and coming home and being a single parent, so it’s a tad annoying. Just having someone there to watch her while I make her dinner even is a huge help. I shouldn’t complain though. She’s so easy going and I’m just whining, really.

Okay, Iguess that’s all I have to complain about, lol! Not much else going on. I’ve got the majority of my Christmas shopping done, just waiting for it to come in the mail. =) Christmas party is Thursday (ended up having to hire the nanny for two hours because of Bryan’s project) and then I think we might have a date night this weekend. We’ll see. We haven’t had one in a while, so it would be nice to get out.

That’s it!

~Sheralyn