to whom it may concern

 Dear So-and-So,

I’ve been wondering about you in the worst ways. Whether you are carousing with the night, or waking up the day. I think about all of the music I’m missing because you haven’t been keeping me in the know, about all of the beauties you’ve been bribing with your wits and charms, how your mother is, whether or not you still do that funny thing with your leg while you sleep. And all of the nooks, bits, and particles stuck in between.

I’ve been having this reoccurring dream where I’m in your bathroom and I’m taking a shower but there’s no soap and I’m allergic to the shampoo. I call out for you to help me but you never answer. Actually, you answer once but as the door knob turns I wake up. Isn’t that odd? My brother is 14 now and is really getting into girls and I don’t like it one bit. My sister is well… you might know so I’ll just skip over that. Do you know it’s been six months to the exact day since we’ve last spoke? I remember because I have a terribly accurate memory of all the saddest days of my life and a terribly inaccurate memory of all the happiest ones.

I’ve been working and wondering and writing letters to dead movie stars and folk singers thinking I can relate to their short lives. It’s somewhat cathartic because they can’t write back- I know even if they were alive they probably wouldn’t but there’s still that chance and I’m not into taking risks these days. You’re turning 25 soon and that idea frightens me. I wonder if you would like to get a drink with me? If you aren’t too busy ravaging the night or raping the day. You can bring anybody you’d like and I promise that I won’t get inappropriate with you. Those days are done, gone like the first scrapes off a top layer of burnt toast. I hope to see you soon.

Responsibly,