In Response to Those Who Dare Disagree

i’ve been lurking around your diary for close to 30 minutes, chuckling softly to myself. i think thats really all i have to say. i’m still laughing. and i agree with your last two entries, yet, find myself internalizing that i am the twit for having one of those “lasting” relationships with my boyfriend. hmmm?

Well, ok. Maybe. But people can’t all be transient. And I don’t think it’s wise to go into a relationship expecting it to fail, either.

I think sometimes we expect too much. Either way.

No, I still disagree, you twit. I’m kidding – sort of. Yes, part of me said that for the joy of a full fledged argument, you know how I am about debates. Anyway, so about that free will. . .

“Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” – Anais Nin

Wow, I had no idea Anais Nin read my diary.

You know more about relationships than you give yourself credit for.

I think you’ve got a very valid point. Most relationships do end, and that people take them so seriously to begin with creates a bit of a problem with that inevitable ending comes. Some people eventually find a relationship that sticks…others don’t. And I’m not saying that it’s all hopeless, or that you shouldn’t ever expect a relationship to last, but you have to be realistic. You can’t think that every relationship you’re in is It, because they’re not. ::hugs::

I believe that two people can evolve together. However, one may evolve faster than the other, and in that case the relationship won’t last. I don’t really believe that when you get married you’re going to to be married forever.. because it’s so rare that two people mature at exactly the same rate. But, there are a lucky few who do.. lucky bastards..lol.

You’re pretty damn lucky that Anais Nin reads your diary..I wish famous cool ass authors read my diary..

Wow, I’m quoted. Cool! And to comment on some notes. No, people rarely mature at the same rate. And people evolve differently. The idea of a life long commitment would be to cheer and support your partner on in their evolving (well, to a reasonable degree). And respect it. And be glad that they evolve, anything else would be unnatural and boring! A very important lesson I’ve learnedis to be grateful that we have never fallen out of love at the same time.

I think making a commitment to be with someone forever, you definitely can’t expect things to stay the same. Also you aren’t always going to have that same spark and connection you had from the beginning. The longer your together the more routine things become. And people have to remember that and be willing to stay commited even if things become somewhat boring. Or make an effort to keep the allure and mystery (you know how I love that mystery!) alive.

Eh mate… you sound like you’ve convinced yourself it’s hopeless… I don’t know how you extrapolate grand truths about men and women and life from one internet relationship. And I know you refuse to believe this, but there is all the difference in the world between conversing romantically with someone about philosophy and literature on a screen you can switch off whenever you want and going out for someone at midnight when it’s pissing it down to buy condoms and tampons because you’ve run out of the former and she swears she DID have a box of the latter but she can’t find it and her period might start tonight and does big eyes at you. All the difference in the world.

You’d think Anais Nin would read a diary with more sex in it… yeah yeah I’ll get my coat.

I like all the talk of evolving. Damn, but that would be great. “Dear God, but yesterday he was a meercat!” But yes, I’d agree with you, really… I might break up with my boyfriend if he ever attempted to talk about the future. It’s a scary thing.

I completely agree with you.

RYN: I was in a very bad mood when I wrote the “because I care” entry. The whole point of that entry was to get shit off my chest..some things I have not said but have thought for years. As far as us being part of the same species, Guy and Girls should be separated…we are totally different.