Insipid Life

Hence my many attempts at writing in the past few weeks, I have a vague suspicion that I might gradually become illiterate. Looking back at my very few entries I seem to be running out of thoughts and controversial concepts. Uninterested and uninspired I stare at the blandness of my surroundings. Amazingly irritation is still a constant, yet it is momentary, not very painful when it does not require reflection. Since unfamiliar people are not very important to me (of course they are) I really don’t see any problem with revealing my stupidity. Spending my whole life trying to figure out ways to make people think I’m intelligent, however my own family thinks I’m stupid. They may not say it but their actions speak in whispers, of their concern for my future and how I may not be able to secure a dull but comforting living. I hear in shouts that I am the one who formulates the plan to MY future, yet their ideas (perhaps wisdom) are commonly imposed upon me. Not that I resist it at all, in fact I agree and take in their idea as my own, this way I will not be disappointed and they will be pleased with my behavior and think I’m getting somewhere with my defective intellect. It astonishes me how insipid life can be, for example this piece is the result of a continuous struggle to make clear the bits of inspiration no matter how small. In reading back through the text I see that I have been fairly successful at fulfilling the task at hand. Irrelevance gratifies my temporary state of mind, so the subject is to be changed immediately. I’m forming a club, nothing real, but my new belief system. It is to be called contradictionism, the basic principals of it are:  do not accept anything and question everything. I’m in need of change to contradict for a while would be magnificent, a breath of fresh carbon dioxide. I shall develop more rules to my newly found scheme, and as soon as I do I’ll post them. Maybe I can persuade some people into joining me; anyway it’ll make for an interesting diary entry, in the hopes that I can give a little flavor to this dull existence of ours.