NoJoMo #2

What was a time you felt the most brave? What was a time you didn’t feel brave at all?

I guess the moment I didn’t feel brave was when I was most brave of all. It was back in 2001, about a month before 9/11. I was living in Florida with James and I had to bond him out of jail. He had been in there for about a mouth and I was 6 month pregnant with Jasha (my baby girl). I had no job and no money, not even to pay the rent. So I pawn everything I owned, which I had go from my daddy after he die 5 months earlier. When James got home he had to go into the hospital for a week cause he got bit by a brown spider in jail. While he was in there our light got cut off, so me and my other two kids went and stay in the lobe of the hospital for two night til he got out.

I was so young and dumb and thought I was in love. When we got back to the apartment we had 5 days to get out of the apartment and no one in James’ family would let me and the kids stay with them. But his brother’s wife did let us stay for a week and than she had a enough. So I was a member of this church and they help me get a hotel room and me and James and the kids stay there for a few weeks and then 9/11. I was sitting in the food stamp office hoping to get some help and when the news came on with the first tower being hit. I thought it was a movie, cause there was no sound. A worker from the back came and turn the TV up and then all the worker come out by the time the second tower was hit. My heart dropped and I just knew the world was ending. I was scared from me and my children and my family were all in Alabama.

As the tower were coming down they started closing the office, because President Bush were in Florida and they knew there was attack on the United States. I got on the bus confused and lost and scared and so was the rest of the world. I got back to the hotel and realize that I need to leave James and go home and make a real life for me and my two kids and the baby that I had on the way.

So a week after 9/11, I got on a bus and left James. It’s been hard being a single mother of three and by March of 2002, I had my baby and found apartment and a full time job. I been do this by myself with no real help from their father for a long time now. And I guess that was my moment of feel brave and not.