Climbing back up out of the valley
So I’m feeling better. Whether friday’s six hours of on and off crying helped, or a big talk with Jack helped, or changing my perspective on how to manage my school demands helped, the end result is that I am no longer feeling totally overwhelmed by what’s going on in my life these days. I had a good time out on Saturday at Jack’s Christmas party, albeit somewhat subdued in comparison to last year, due to the number of people that have already left with the early party to Afghanistan. The supportive notes have been really helpful at getting a mirror into what kinds of pressure I was putting onto myself, as have chats with friends and family. No wonder I had such a hard time on friday, I need to give myself more of a break to let big life changes sink in.
I do count my blessings that Jack isn’t leaving with the early party- he’d be leaving a full week earlier if that were the case. As it is, I should be able to finish my written exams and papers, and fit in my practical exam redo (I only failed 1 of 3 sections, so only have to redo one section) aaaaaannnd fit in a trip to Jasper. Jack really wants to go snowboarding and to have some time away from errands and work for a day or two. Luckily, he gets a 5 day pre-deployment leave so hopefully we can sneak off to the mountains this weekend. I have a suspicion that Jack might have something up his sleeve for that trip- he keeps hinting about how we will do our Christmas present exchange then and how I’ll really like the present (!). I’m hoping for a seat warmer/massager from Canadian Tire that is 65% off this week- it was coooold on my butt this morning as I drove off to work. To boot, I had to plug in my car last night but it still didn’t feel like starting this morning. It really is a moody car, considering its brand new!
My sister might be coming home to Canada mid January. She has no money, no job, and has spent the last 16 months looking for a job so she could stay. I’ve lent her my max family amount for a loan (she can pay it back anytime when she has stable income) but am also going to pay for her flight home. I guess she just really wanted to stay in Belize with her man, but to have spent your emergency money and then some and not be able to afford to fly home sounds like she stayed just a little bit too long for my comfort level if it were me!
I have two patients today who should leave me enough time and energy to do some studying tonight before tomorrow’s final. They are both waiting for surgery, so not too many big plan changes in teh works today. Keep em happy and quiet, preferably without drugs if possible!
Ah, the joy of feeling better- I look forward to my heated underground parking temperature car before heading home tonight, although its supposed to be a high of zero (that just sounds bizarre) tonight. We’ll see!
~H
NB: I am currently sleeping less than 3 hours at a time, sometimes only 3-5 hours per night. I’m not tired though- it is not normal although given the circumstances it is also not overly concerning- I get a lot of work done with not having to sleep as much as I used to (8-9 hours/night)