unharshening a bit

so i took a little time to think about it from his perspective and i kind of understand why he did it. (this is in reference a horrible comment by my recent ex).

After our first couple of dates, I told him that i liked him a lot but didn’t want a relationship. He put a lot of effort into wooing me into a relationship, letting me know how much he liked me, how pretty and fun and funny he thought it was and how he really wanted to be with me.

After hanging out (not dating) for a few weeks, I told him I didn’t want to see him anymore for various reasons. He once again put a lot of effort into making sure we could still hang out and eventually kind of wooing me back.

Once again, we had a falling out, and once again he went out of his way to tell me how much he liked me and missed me and really wanted to be with me.

I should take this opportunity to say that he is *not* a pushover nice guy, so he did in fact really genuinely like me a lot.

Finally we officially got together and especially at the beginning he was full of compliments and affection and letting me know how much he wanted me (and of course once we were together I did the same too). I guess his affection did taper off at the end, but….

after we broke up and we knew it was over for real, we still hung out and flirted (no kissing/etc) because, well, i only had a month left and we still liked each other. Even at that point, even then and as we were breaking up he was telling me how much he wanted to be with me.

So we have all that, we’ve kind of decided we can still hang out and flirt till I leave and then all the sudden I just throw it on him that I can’t talk to him anymore, at all, for at least a few weeks. I don’t doubt that was a shock and it hurt.

Then he for some reason thinks that I have slept with two other men. He has put all this effort into wooing me our whole relationship and letting me know how much he wants to be with me and in the end i stop talking to him and fuck two other guys (I didn’t). But he thinks this. So yes, I can see why he is hurt and fucking pissed.

Nevertheless, I was ready to be nice and start talking again and take all the blame and admit it was foolish and mean to totally cut him off. I was going to take all the blame and he was too stubron to talk to me anymore. And also, I thought he was sleeping with someone else, and a particularly hurtful someone else, and while I was hurt, I eventually accepted it and handled it maturely.

So I guess I’m just saying I understand why he felt a need to do what he did. But he still could have handled it like a fucking adult. There was still no excuse for making that the last thing he’ll ever say to me without ever hearing my side of it.

Oh well.