thanks for totally validating me leaving you

so when i told my ex i couldn’t talk to him for a few weeks because i needed to get over him, he totally cut me off and said we couldn’t talk anymore, ever. harsh but somewhat understandable since my request came totally out of the blue. today i see him sign onto aim  (he had previously blocked me, quite mature) and i think, "hey, maybe he’s changed his mind" and i was preparing to send him a nice message.

before i can, i get an awesome message from him and then he quickly reblocks me: ex (11:22:36 AM): just wanted to congratulate you on sleeping with two dudes in like 2 weeks (y)

first of all, i have not even kissed a man since him. i didn’t mean to but i did fall for someone else but nothing has happened except 100% innocent cuddling and literal sleeping. i think that it was too soon to feel that way about someone else, but hey, it happened. and one night i was drunk and did sleep at a guy from work’s house to avoid driving home but once again, nothing happened, and i didn’t even like the guy.

furthermore, 11 days after our breakup, about 5 days after we stopped talking and like a week after the last time he’d cuddled with me, the ex changed his relationship status on facebook to complicated and what does that mean except sleeping with someone? this also happened after he had posted some cutesy conversation with some ex girlfriend. but i got over it. he found someone else he liked, fine. it hurt at first but in the end i figured he was happier with her.

it’s none of his damn business anyway who i sleep with or not. if i had slept with someone that message still would have been a total dick move. and i also want to know how he knows this. only 2 people in real life know. i did post a drunken entry at like 3am the other day that mentioned the literal sleeping with one guy but i changed it to private  few hours later. i suppose he is being creepy stalkery and reading my diary but god damn, that is creepy and unnecessary. i guess he thinks he’s made his point that it’s dumb to write such personal things in a public diary but i really don’t care what he knows. i would have admitted it to his face if we were talking and it came up in conversation.

what i do care about is that the man i dated for four months turned out to be a completely immature asshole. I always knew he wasn’t a pushover nice guy, but i always told myself and others that he wasn’t an asshole either. maybe the nice guy-asshole dichotomy really is a two-option system. really, i’m friends or at least on friendly terms with almost all of my exes. i already hated that we couldn’t be friends and chat nicely and whatnot.

i had gotten to the point a few days ago of feeling really good about the breakup. i was totally over him but in a way that i thought, he was a great, fun guy to date for a while and we had great times but it had no long term potential so while i was glad i dated him, i was also glad it was over. now i’m just pissed that i ever let such an asshole into my life. there was an incident back in march when he was very crappy to me but i convinced myself that that was a one-time thing and that it wasn’t really him and that he’d never act that way again because, well, that was what he told me. but of course it was him. i gave up a lot for him. i was totally happy being single and didn’t really want a relationship but i gave in because i liked him a lot. i made compromises. whatever. even at this point, i still wish i could just sit down and talk to him about things and find a way to not hate each other because it means a lot to me to end things on friendly terms. but i know that will never happen.

instead of being forever remembered as a great, fun guy, he will now be forever remembered as asshole #2 that i dated.