Update

Still. April.

5 months, no contact. Except…

In two weeks, hes finally getting dna tested. When he swore up and down she wasnt his and i was just a whore.

Eat his fucking words, i swear.

Every damn time, i remember those hateful words to me.

And built me up, painted a picture of how beautiful i was, only to knock me down and twist it against me, in his mania.

He will do it to her, too.

I need to never forget the evil shit he’s done to me, right down to the abuse.

He will hurt her, too if he hadn’t already.

I read something about them not needing anger management because they manage their anger just fine around others.

And it breaks my heart.

Please, understand that abuse is not okay, on any level and honestly,  i don’t even want to look back on this, and i do, to check myself.

He painted a picture, and i bought it…. he will paint another.

I struggle w all of this, because I’m just lonely.

Single moms.

Thinking nobody really wants me because i am 45 w a 4 yr old who is hyperactive.

Fuck.

I cried for years over this msn to just love me.

He doesn’t love anyone but himself.