A hundred times
I wanted to write to him a hundred times. I do miss him. The only man I’ve ever been so in love with. I know he needs anger classes.
He has to want it. I can’t help him.
But that message this morning got me so fucked up.
And the AE no response. So this tells me, not to do it.
So i sit here with my thoughts.
He trusts me, sexually. That’s how we connect.
Is he just fucking w my head, seeing how far backward i will bend for him?
Does he feel bad about even asking me? I would rather he come to me than find someone else.
I miss the good times.
What will it be like the first time back w me? And, Will it be soon??
He can’t find a single person to bring him here? Not one? He can’t say, hey, i need to talk to her face to face and his friends be understanding?
Are they keeping him away because they’re afraid for me? Or manipulation?
He could pay someone.
Theres a million ways.
How long should i wait?
Ugh.
You deserve to be treated fairly, kindly, and with respect. Don’t forget that it’s okay to put yourself first.
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Thank you.
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