Brief intermission
Okay, so this is the first post in a while not ZPD related. That story has a long way to go, and I have something grave on my mind.
I’ve seen a lot of people within the internets voicing their distaste for a person named Jake. A little bit of searching confirmed that people are just mad as piss at "The Bachelor" and his choice for the woman he will spend the rest of his publics interest with. Apparently there were better offers on the table, if you were to ask the public audience.
Just to be clear, I didn’t watch the bachelor. I think I may have seen an episode once during one of the other seasons. A guy with the last name "Firestone" (heir to the incredible tire fortune) was supposed to choose between a group of twenty something twenty somethings. It seemed like an awesome situation for any man to be in. A flock of heavenly beauties, carefully screened by television producers to ward out histories of genetic diseases or fatness. Girls that were intelligent, or funny, never both. Girls that clung to him as if he were a prize to be won, and surely his name was some evidence of that. Firestone had supplied Ford with tires since forever ago. When could that ever go wrong?
It troubled me though… why did he need to be on a dating show that practically guaranteed a woman at the end of it? He was a handsome Firestone. A trip to the doctors office to check out a cold sore practically guaranteed a woman at the end of it. There were millions of shmucks with money, and a lack of courage or communication skill. Surely there could be a show about them? *Cough* Average Joe *GASP*
A show like the Bachelor, has no happy ending. And to illustrate my point, I’ve developed an anecdote to compare it to. The Bachelor is a competition much like handing an high powered rifle to a strong, silent, promising hunter, and setting him loose into a tightly packed corral full of tall, meaty elk. The hunt is gone, but still the choice of elk is wrought with drama. There lies a proud animal. There lies a fiery disposition. There are some taught flanks! They all move about, this way and that. Crash into each other, kick and bay. The long range rifle is swung about in indecision for some time, until the hunter realizes that a decision needs to be made. EE NEE MEE NEE MY NEE MO, and BOOM. The show is over.
Afterwards, the hunter will mount the bust of his conquest in the drawing room, and display it as a trophy to all who come to marvel at his prowess. He is met with the skepticism of other hunters, doubting either his ability to bring down such a beast within the regular parameters of sport, or if that really was the animal with biggest rack. After all… he had a herd to choose from. In a corral. Was that really the best he could get?
In my estimation… he might keep the trophy for a while, out of insistence that this really was something of substance. Then he would admit his shame to himself, and put it away in an attic somewhere to collect dust… or child support whatever the case may be.
Who wins in this game?
Derek I love your social analysis. you need to come over and hang out, I met this really cool literary major at a party the other day. She is writing a book of poetry, and talks booky stuff. You need to meet her, and we need to hang out in cafe’s acting better than everyone and telling ourselves the opposite while convincing anyone who listens that we are more intelligent than them
Warning Comment
Derek I love your social analysis. you need to come over and hang out, I met this really cool literary major at a party the other day. She is writing a book of poetry, and talks booky stuff. You need to meet her, and we need to hang out in cafe’s acting better than everyone and telling ourselves the opposite while convincing anyone who listens that we are more intelligent than them
Warning Comment
Derek I love your social analysis. you need to come over and hang out, I met this really cool literary major at a party the other day. She is writing a book of poetry, and talks booky stuff. You need to meet her, and we need to hang out in cafe’s acting better than everyone and telling ourselves the opposite while convincing anyone who listens that we are more intelligent than them
Warning Comment
Derek I love your social analysis. you need to come over and hang out, I met this really cool literary major at a party the other day. She is writing a book of poetry, and talks booky stuff. You need to meet her, and we need to hang out in cafe’s acting better than everyone and telling ourselves the opposite while convincing anyone who listens that we are more intelligent than them
Warning Comment
i’m not invited am i. i like the part about the animal with the biggest rack though…
Warning Comment
i’m not invited am i. i like the part about the animal with the biggest rack though…
Warning Comment
i’m not invited am i. i like the part about the animal with the biggest rack though…
Warning Comment
i’m not invited am i. i like the part about the animal with the biggest rack though…
Warning Comment
Im definitely not invited. And I’m glad! bwaha.. Moving on.. Im impressed this anecdote is pure gold! My favorite part you ask? “..doubting either his ability to bring down such a beast within the regular parameters of sport, or if that really was the animal with biggest rack.” Also for the record “presentable” is not cute. But umm so you think Im cute..(testing the level of awkwardness? = 10)
Warning Comment
Im definitely not invited. And I’m glad! bwaha.. Moving on.. Im impressed this anecdote is pure gold! My favorite part you ask? “..doubting either his ability to bring down such a beast within the regular parameters of sport, or if that really was the animal with biggest rack.” Also for the record “presentable” is not cute. But umm so you think Im cute..(testing the level of awkwardness? = 10)
Warning Comment
Im definitely not invited. And I’m glad! bwaha.. Moving on.. Im impressed this anecdote is pure gold! My favorite part you ask? “..doubting either his ability to bring down such a beast within the regular parameters of sport, or if that really was the animal with biggest rack.” Also for the record “presentable” is not cute. But umm so you think Im cute..(testing the level of awkwardness? = 10)
Warning Comment
Im definitely not invited. And I’m glad! bwaha.. Moving on.. Im impressed this anecdote is pure gold! My favorite part you ask? “..doubting either his ability to bring down such a beast within the regular parameters of sport, or if that really was the animal with biggest rack.” Also for the record “presentable” is not cute. But umm so you think Im cute..(testing the level of awkwardness? = 10)
Warning Comment