Forget About It

—insert angry-ass, sad, bitter words here. Then, delete them.—

End of rant here:

Now i have to be able to really grab it. Nihilism. Self-suffiency. Belief in nothing. Care for nothing. Need for nothing but nothing. Because, honestly, that’s all i have now anyway.

i am a fucking rock and a fucking island. Now. Now more than ever.

—————————————————-

On a different note:

i socalized again on Monday night. Boy from Tucson and i drank at KGB Bar and talked until 4:00am (by that time i was pleasently trashed) when we went and ate and i got home at about 6:00am. He’s a good guy. He has a lot inside him i couldn’t imagine he did. i bought him a cactus i need to take to him.

It’ll be nice to have a boy to loaf around with. We’re supposed to go to the Zoo soon.

We’ll see.

i am afraid to put too much effort or care into this. He’s just going to leave anyway.

*hugz you* You are WONDERFUL and I LOVE YOU DEEPLY, and I know that you know if you need me I’m here, I would call you but I don’t have your phone number and its late..but FU*K it if you’re still awake e-mail me your phone number SailorNova@juno.com and I’ll give you a buzz rite now…never forget I love you!

stray cat strutting

June 6, 2002

i haven’t been able to break away to come up to NY and I’m sorry about that 🙁 want to come down to DC? it’s a short train trip and I have a comfy couch and you can play tourist! *bounce*

there are people in this world that care about you more than you could ever comprehend. i know the situation you are in at the moment is beyond difficult and i support you in whatever decision you make. i want you happy, and i want you to be where you will be happy. i miss you more than i even understand myself, but would rather miss you and know you are happy, than have you back

and see you suffer. i believe in you, and i know KNOW you can do what you’ve worked so hard to achieve. this is a snag that will bring you to a better situation. think of it that way. i love you!

I hate my toenails.

prdrprincesa

i feel so terrible right now for not doing everything i can to help you here. i am so very sorry.

With all the people in the world that love you, how can you even think to say that?

Iris Pale

I love you more than goats and pigs and cows. And liquor, too. Let this be a measure of my devotion.

I saw a link to your diary through temmahkrik’s diary and decided to check it out. I like the look of it, pretty spify if I do say so myself. I know how you feel about loving someone and how the feel in return…happened to me alot in the past. I even get paranoid to this day with stuff like that in relationships. Don’t feel bad, you’re not the only one. Cheer up, things’ll get better for ya 🙂

This boy seems very nice Ang. Give him a chance. Anyone worth anything would love you unconditionally and if they can’t then you don’t need them. You are worth all that and more. Never shut your heart up. I love you.

you are seriously with me ALL THE TIME…I don’t really do anything without consulting my “imaginary emelye” first. So, in this case, you really do rule my world. “love you, love you, love you….” on the two train. -your fan