a little of this, a little of that

First, though, thanks for all the kind notes about Colfax. I think she was telling us goodbye. We’ve moped around for days, but at least she didn’t linger on getting sicker and sicker, and we didn’t have to make the terribly difficult decision to put her to sleep. 

I keep wanting to write something, and am having serious brain block. Everything just sounds boooooring. So – survey time! That’s not boring at all! This is quite the bizarro mishmash survey, too.

What was the last thing you ordered from Mcdonalds? I believe it was the coffee I got on the way to Asheville weekend before last. Because it was the only thing open without driving WAY out of my way. And that was some nasty coffee. I used to like McDonalds’ coffee, but this was awful. Almost worse than none at all. And I know hot coffee is a good thing, but their coffee is so hot that I kept burning my tongue on it – does it really have to be boiling?? I was halfway home before it cooled off enough to drink.

What was the last button you pushed? I guess it was the remote button unlocking  my car. That’s the last one that springs to mind. Or, no, it was the button to shut the sunroof when I got home today. It was warm enough to drive around with the sunroof open!!! And I very nearly forgot to shut it.

Do you own a pet hedgehog? No, but I’d love one. I’m not sure that’s a pet that’s available in the US, though.

Have you ever set foot in a tanning salon? Not for a tan, but I used to get my hair cut in a place with tanning beds, so I guess that counts. The Tan N Curl. Not quite as fun a name as the Curl Up And Dye. 
  
Have you ever faked being drunk? I haven’t, but Baker B used to. He and a friend would crash parties in high school and pretend to be completely sloshed. I’m sure it was very amusing.

Have you ever smoked tobacco out of a hookah? No, but that’s a great visual! Very Alice In Wonderland.
 
Are you donating your organs? Well, not right NOW. I’m kind of still using them. I’ll be happy to donate when I’m finished with them, though.
 
What is the last thing you ate? A shortcake thing that I made to go with these very very delicious strawberries I bought. Sadly, the shortcakes just are not good. Since this is at least the third time I’ve made them, and they are never good, I think I need to try a different recipe. It’s from The Joy of Cooking and is kind of just a biscuit, but they are always flat and tasteless no matter how careful I am not to overwork the dough. 
 

What’s the last thing you drank? That would be the delightful Dead Guy Ale that I’m enjoying right this minute.

Who called you last? Last for what? Oh, last on the phone, I guess. I think actually that would be the person who called me at nearly five yesterday. She’d gotten an email about the new state regulation that is going to make it even easier to get into teacher education. Now if you can’t pass all three parts of the Praxis I – reading, writing, and math – you can still weasel in as long as the three scores you did get add up to at least 544. So somebody sent an email to a bunch of people who recently took it and didn’t pass all three parts to let them know they might not have to retake it if their total score was high enough.

SO she calls me at nearly five on Friday going on and on and on about how she took all three parts and she did fine on the math and on the writing but she failed the reading and she just doesn’t know why she failed the reading but it’s something about minimum scores or something and maybe she doesn’t have to take it again and she just isn’t too sure what the email is telling her (note I refrained from commenting that I just couldn’t imagine how she could possibly have failed the reading section) blah blah blah blah. So I tell her yes, if all three scores add up to at least 544 she won’t have to retake the reading. Because, duuuude, we WANT people who are functionally illiterate out in the school systems!

And then she says, "Oh, good! Can somebody tell me if my score is high enough?"

"Umm… didn’t they send you a copy?" I ask.

"Yes, they did," she says. "I have it right here!"

"Well, then… ADD UP THE THREE SCORES AND SEE IF YOU MADE AT LEAST 544!!!!" I tried not to scream. And note that I did NOT tell her that if she can’t figure out how to add the three numbers in front of her and determine whether the total is equal to or greater than 544, I am officially declaring that she’s ALSO failed the math part, and she needs to change her major. NOW. I certainly did want to, though.

Wow. Where was I??

What is in the back seat of your car right now? The back seat of my car is currently a Junk O’Rama. I blame Baker B, who has been driving it more than usual since his car is having disturbing gear problems. All Baker B has to do is drive a car to the mailbox and it looks like a gaggle of hobos has moved in. There are at least three jackets, several pairs of socks, a number of shoes (okay, one pair is my walking shoes), three or four travel mugs (okay, okay, those are mine too), a bunch of Conrads coffee cups (mostly his), several winter hats and numerous gloves despite it being mid-May (it could still snow!), a couple of AAA travel guides (I have no idea why), at least two board games (Wizard of Oz Monopoly and Yatzhee which I can’t spell at all), maps, several books, and 34,081 CDs. For starters.   
 
   
What are you wearing right now? My black "yoga" pants that have seen very little yoga lately, and an extraordinarily ratty black Tshirt that I’ve had for many many years. It’s way too big, full of tiny little holes, has weird stains from hair dyeing mishaps, and is very very comfortable. Unsightly, but comfortable.

Last movie you saw? What WAS the last movie I saw?? I’ve got two Netflix movies I really need to watch and send back – The Last King of Scotland and Capote. Baker B is in a synch lull and hasn’t been hogging the queue lately, so I’ve been ordering stuff I want to see. Oh, I did watch Careful, He Might Hear You last weekend. It’s a kind of odd Australian movie I saw YEARS ago – back in the 80s – and have wanted to see again for ages. I never could find it on video, but just thought to look it up on Netflix, and there it was on DVD. It was pretty much just like I remembered it. I am SURE we also got something else last weekend, but I can not remember what.  For the last couple of nights we’ve watched Clatterford, which isn’t a movie but is a really really funny BBC series. About women in the women’s guild of an odd little town with lots of peculiar residents. It’s from the Absolutely Fabulous writers and stars them as well, in TOTALLY different roles. Along with the Vicar of Dibley and Mrs. Doyle from Father Ted, and a zillion other people Ilove.

What do you want people to say about you when you die? "Is it time for Twister yet?" </obscure whose line reference> What they will say is "She sure couldn’t do a short and concise survey, could she??"
 
 
Your preferred method of cooking: Having someone else do it for me.
 
What shoes you’re wearing: None. I’m wearing fuzzy purple socks.

Where your keys are right now: Well, that’s a VERY timely question, as I’ve just realized they’re on the little table beside me, which isn’t at all where they ought to be, and I was just thinking if I don’t get up and hang them on their hook, I will NEVER find them tomorrow.

What your olympic event would be: Going on and on and on in a completely random and pointless manner. 
 
Oh, that’s it!  I’m done!!!