I’m a Feline…Edit

Theme of the Week: You are an animal. Describe the highlights (pros) and low points (cons) of your life or write as a ‘day in the life.’

12:00 am – 2:45 am: Meowed at shadows on the wall.
2:45 am – 5:30 am: Chased random objects around the house, the noisiest I could find, a jingle ball, crinkle paper, bubble wrap.
5:30 am – 6:00 am: Jumped on servant’s bed and pawed her face, meowing to tell her I am hungry and I need her to get up to feed me. I cannot believe it took me a half an hour to wake her ass up. Sometimes she is so lazy, but, alas, good help is hard to find these days.
6:00 am – 6:05 am: Wound around servant’s feet while she served me my food and fresh water so she wouldn’t forget why she was up. She is awfully forgetful as well as lazy.
6:05 am – 6:15 am: Confused my servant by turning up my nose at the sludge she tried to pass off as food. As if I want to eat something that smells like vegetables! Ugh, disgusting! I really don’t know how she eats the stuff! She finally got a clue and provided me with the meat my lithe form requires for optimal functioning.
6:15 am – 6:20 am: Daintily nibbled at my fresh food, I do have to watch my figure, you know. Plus if I get direly hungry later on, I do not want to have to rely on that servant, since sometimes she leaves for hours on end and expects me to fend for myself!
6:20 am – 7:00 am: Attempted to glean some warmth off my servant by laying close to her. First I tried laying between her legs, then up on her side, then at her back, but she kept squirming and changing position so I finally had to lay up by her head. That’s where most of her warmth is anyways. By the time I finally got comfortable the stupid beeping thing she insists on keeping right beside her head made the loud noise it occasionally makes. I was dumped unceremoniously off of her head. Luckily my litheness allows me to always land on my feet.
7:00 am – 8:00 am: Wound around servant’s feet so she would remember to massage me. For some reason she gets really annoyed when I do this, as if she has better things to do!
8:00 am – 6:00 pm: It’s a blessing in disguise when my servant leaves as it allows me to catch up on much needed beauty rest. I found a nice spot of sun and lounged, slept, nibbled on my food, and generally spent a nice quiet day.
6:00 pm – 8:00 pm: Wound around my servant’s feet so she would remember to clean up my ‘duty box’ as well as the dirty dish since I ate most of the meat she left out for me, and what was left on it was now crusty. Gleaned some meat and cheese from my servant’s meal. Why she thought she could eat better food than what she serves to me, I’ll never know.
8:00 pm – 12:00 am Attempted yet again to get warmth off my servant, unsuccessfully. Wandered off to chase and meow at the shadows.

Remember: I Am Always Watching You!