Letters never sent.

So. I emailed the letter to mum. cc’d it to H. Just got this….

Your message

To: [mum]
Cc: [h]
Subject: some serious stuff
Sent: 3/8/2006 1:09 AM

was read on 3/8/2006 7:56 PM.
—-

from mum. Well, it’s automated so, from mum’s computer.

Now we wait, I guess.

I feel sort of like that scene in Chasing Amy, when they’re in the car and he confesses his love for her, cuz he just can’t contain it any more. And so he tells her he loves her and that he had to say it, even if it “queers their friendship” and messes it up and stuff. And she’s like, great, just great. Thanks. You saying that doesn’t change your life, but it throws my entire being into a tailspin. (paraphrased, obviously.)

And I think to myself, what right do I have? To share this information just to make ME feel better??? Maybe not “just” to make me feel better. But seriously, what can come of it? I don’t know.

Mum already called me for my birthday a few hours ago. So I dunno if she’ll call again. Or if she’ll write. She’ll probably have to consult with my sister first. Or maybe even patrick, who knows….

I think I’ll watch a movie. wee.