applicationgraduation.

My stomach aches. I have an exam that I -should- be studying for right now. I’m exhausted.

AJ spent the weekend, after I got home from the Oysters presentation (where much drama ensued. UGH. I wouldn’t care if it had only been me- i mean, I’d care but I wouldn’t do anything about it. But other people got hurt. very, very, very hurt. and i can’t stand by and let that happen without saying something. so i said something. no one has replied yet….)

It was so lovely to have her at my apt when I got home. heh. I like the whole coming home to someone bit.

Of course. I spent much of the weekend crying. Because I’m a fuckwit. (perhaps that’s not the best word for this…) Frustrated at myself. Frustrated that I’m hurting her because I’m unable to just ignore the stupid shit in my head and dealing with it just….I don’t know.

I was just going to write a list of Things To Do but when I started thinking about them, my heart started racing. I’d rather not have a panic or anxiety attack in the middle of the library. Well, technically I’m off to the side of the library. But still.

I don’t want to write anymore. don’t want to think anymore.