A Storm is Brewing
So often in the past, I write about wanting to write more and plan to but then months and sometimes even years go by before I ever write another entry. Yesterday’s entry was freeing to me, so figured I should try it again.
We got dark clouds near by but not supposed to get rain until later this evening. I enjoy watching summer storms. There is just something about a rainy day mixed with thunder and lightning. I feel like we do not get enough storms like I recall when I was younger. Those were the best. Or getting caught in the rain when playing outside and just dancing in the rain. I have definitely danced in the rain with my two boys. It’s so much fun and freeing.
I guess you could say I’m looking for that freedom more and more these days. I decided this morning to take a break from facebook. It has gotten to me a lot lately and I don’t want that to be higher priority than other things in my life. I truly was too, because I would spend HOURS on it, without even realizing it. I have nothing to show for it and well I get more angry or annoyed with the content I see from friends and family.
Speaking of family, I’m trying my hardest but having that additional family of my husband’s side has been really trying for me lately. Everybody has an opinion which is great but I truly do not need to hear it ALL THE TIME, especially when it comes to my kids and my parenting. It’s been so tough as I don’t argue but rather end up being quiet. I was raised to be respectful of my elder, so to speak. So I don’t know what to say but I sure do have a lot to say once they are either left to go home or ended their weekly face time call with the boys. Always. I know that’s not healthy at all, but I feel like I don’t know how best to express myself without it coming off as defensive. I just have no idea how to approach it. So I do what I can to ease that tension.
I spent an hour reading the Bible this morning and it felt great. Today has been a good and productive day so far. At least when comparing to yesterday where I did pretty much nothing and was in a daze. Just felt sad and lonely. But today is a new day, a different day. I feel okay.
So here’s hoping for better good and new days for me.