nevermind

I wrote a big, long, ranting woe-is-me entry and then after getting a much-needed smack upside the head (thanks, Druid) decided to make it private.

I wasn’t intending to be a cry baby – I think more than anything I just needed to get all that off my chest and get it out in the open so that I could let it go and focus on moving forward.

Regardless, I’m starting to realize that I feel a strange sense of calm. Yes, I’m still worried. Yes, I’m still anxious. No, nothing grand has happened.

The reality of the matter is that I am going to be laid off, effective November 30th. As much as I don’t like it, it’s a fact. I’m not the only person this is happening to at my company – and I’m hardly alone. The unemployment rate may be slowly inching downward, but it’s still high. All of those people are able to figure something out – there’s no reason to believe that I can’t work through it as well.

I can’t change what’s happening, so freaking out or getting depressed over it is only going to make an already bad situation worse. The only thing I can do now is keep making an effort and see what happens.

I’ll be back to write more when I’m in a better mental state. Writing when down seems to not work out so well for me these days.