The basics…

I’m not really sure what I want this to be…I’ve had online diaries before, but they never quite went the way I wanted or I lost interest in them because I still used pen and paper and thought it best to keep my ramblings to myself… but we live in a world of technology, and I don’t tweet, I don’t use facebook, tumblr or deviantart: So I’m definately not a child of the internet.

         Yet here I am, trying to make an indent. Something to say I was here…like the rest of the world.

 

Anyway, I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years now, but we’re currently doing the whole long distance thing. So you’ll probably hear about that more often than not.

I’m a reader, or at least I’m trying to be. I love reading, but it’s hard to read the stuff you want to read when you’re studying English at university… it kind of becomes about the things you have to read, which isn’t always captivating.

But like everyone else I’m just trying to do things that make me happy.

I spend most of my time worrying that I’m not what my boyfriend wants, and the distance really doesn’t make things easier. He’s an internet child through and through, as are his friends. And yet, he’s with me…

It kinda makes me doubt somethings. But he’s great, and I love him. I just hate the uncertainty and the uneven-ness in our relationship sometimes.

I’m not the quirky, gamer chick or the nerdy artsy type. I’m not a unusual, or normal. I sometimes feel like I’m almost not a person because I don’t have anything that makes me real; I’ve very few real interests, friends, opinions or feelings. I don’t really feel comfortable exploring interest or opinions because if I do, I’ll probably end up looking stupid and my boyfriend will judge. I don’t want him to feel like I’m copying him, but at the same time I want to take an interest in the things he’s interested in. I don’t know what I should be and I don’t have the backbone to say what I’m not.

I guess I’m a changable person. Lol, that’ll be my thing.

Shame it’s not what my boyfriend wants.

 

Anyhow! That got kind of heavy.

On another note, I absolutely love quotes from my favourite books, or books I will one day find the time to read. So I’m sure they’ll be plenty of them through this thing.

 

Bye for now.

Karen.

 

"And do not call the tortoise unworthy because She is not something else"- Walt Whitman "Song of Myself"