I’m over it

Right now I am so over the bullsh*t in my life.  You know growing up I did whatever was ask of me.  If someone told me to jump off a bridge, I would.  Because I never wanted to disappoint my family.    No matter what they asked I did. Whatever people asked me to do, I did.   Everyone know this.  I knew later in life that would come back to haunt me.  I honestly feel like a  doormat.  People walk all over me.

I moved back home because I was really home sick.  But now, i don’t want to be here anymore.  i would do anything to move.   I’m tired of feeling like a disappointment and/or a doormat.  I’ve been trying to make things better.  I’m attempting to go back to school but haven’t been doing so well.  I’m stuck at the moment and not to mention, I have been so tired lately.   But no matter what I do, nothing is right. At home, work, my g-mas, etc. 

Things have changed in my family.   To where honestly, moving may be best for my family.  I know Chris will never do it.  But as I have told him before I’m gonna end up snapping.    Sometimes I think people think I am joking but I’m not.  I’m angry.  I have every right to be. 

But keeping my mouth shout is the best option for me.  It always has been.  Can’t get in trouble if you don’t say anything right?