Vent re Caregiver Cost

11-3-2022

I’m not sure what I’m doing.  I’ve thought about starting a journal for a long time.  Will I keep this up? Who knows? What possessed me to put it online? I’m really just writing this for me.  Today will be a short post.  Maybe I will write more stuff later.  I’ve wanted a place to write my story for awhile. Maybe this will encourage me to do it.  However, today I’m upset. Today is not that day.  It wasn’t a bad day.  Just frustrating.  I found out my caregiving agency was raising its price.  I already can’t afford it so I don’t get all of the services I need.  I’m now going to have to cut it back even more.  I love my caregiver.  Sure, I could switch to another agency but I have been with other agencies.  They suck.  The caregivers come in and get paid to do nothing.  My current caregiver is amazing.  You can’t duplicate that kind of care.  Trust me.  I have been through a lot of caregivers to know I have the best of the best.  She is worth it.  The agency does not pay her what she is worth.  Unfortunately, the agency is going to force me to lose her I think.  I don’t know what to do.  I can’t make extra money to pay them grow on trees.  I only receive $1300 a month from the state and a little bit from family to help.  That little from family could end at any time too.  I was told she would help me for a “season,” whatever that means.  I don’t qualify for Medicare yet and my husband’s insurance won’t pay for the caregiving service.  My retirement has all but been wiped clean from medical bills.  I sound like I’m “poor pitiful me-ing.” I don’t mean to be but I feel hopeless sometimes.  I will manage though. It is what it is.  I am thankful my aunt hasn’t stopped helping me yet. I will be screwed when that happens.  Things could always be worse though so there is that.  I feel better for getting this out.

I don’t know if people read these or if it’s private but my life is a dumpster fire. I’m depressed at times, can be pretty judgmental, mean, or whatever but I can also be nice and funny.  My point is, you may not want to read my stuff.  Oh, I’ll definitely talk about my animals a lot too. Anyway, here’s your warning label. Sorry in advance.