Four A.M. Coffee
Dearest Sima,
Now that I am set on downsizing, I have this irresistible urge to purge everything. I’ve started a mental list of things that need to go, like my vanity. What’s odd about this urge is that vanity was the first thing to pop into my mind. I adore that vanity! You know I was so pleased when I purchased it because it was a dream of mine to have one just like it. It is perfect and straight out of an old movie. I was telling Chef about the oddity of letting it go so willingly. “It was my dream to have this,” I said. His response? “Now you’ve had the dream.” So logical. One of the many reasons I love him.
A package from me will arrive shortly. Your manuscript is lovingly wrapped alongside a few treats I purchased on my recent outing. You’ll laugh when you see the tiny purple box tucked inside. The contents reminded me of our road trip to Salem. Of course, I have one that matches!
The newest addition to my bedside table is a five-year One Line a Day journal. Its small and adorable design reminds me of Beauty and the Beast or other fairytales. I missed a couple of entries, and I am proud of myself for resisting the urge to go back and fill them in. My insistence on perfection went to battle with my commitment to remain in the present. Remaining in the present won—this time.
I have no work today due to the holiday, but I am awake. I am awake so early for the same reason I fight to sleep on Sunday nights: I want to prolong the enjoyment of nothingness. There are no expectations placed upon me in these hours. It’s bliss and contentment.
I planned to go out today for brunch but decided to make this a complete pajama day. I’m going to do a bit of writing, delve into a new book, and lounge about like I have no responsibilities in the world. It’s supposed to rain today, making for a perfect experience.
I may pick up my unjournal again. It’s been neglected on a shelf for many years. My last addition was centered around something unpleasant, and I’ve left it undisturbed since. I need to create another entry so that I can move past that moment in time and begin to fill the pages. Alternatively, I could start a new one. Would it be better to consider that one is complete even in its state of incompleteness? Something to ponder.
Vive la vie en question!
Always, Greta
I think I have exactly the same five-year One Line A Day journal from the way you described it. It’s so fun to look back and see how you’ve evolved in your thinking as time goes on. I frequently forget that I have it though, and it’s stretched into a 10-year journal with sometimes 4+ year gaps but that just adds to its charm.
As always, your writing is such a pleasure to read. You seem like an amazing friend to have, I relate very well. <3
@jubaliee Thank you! I’m enjoying your entries and comments, as well.
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