moments.

I am sitting at a neighborhood coffeshop, at a counter staring out the window onto Melrose Avenue. Fairfax High School is just getting out and teenagers are streaming out onto the street. “My Immortal” by Evanesence is playing in the speakers just above my head and it takes me right back to those first few weeks when Eric and I first got together. How overwhelming and exciting it all was. How unexpected. How special, even then before I knew.

There was this night we, along with a few friends, met down the street here in Hollywood at this little music venue-slash-bar to see a band play. I had hardly begun to comprehend how my platonic feelings had started to morph and yet I remember being absolutely crushed, in the best possible melty way, when his fingers grazed the small of my back and it was slow electricity. He must have been leaning into me to say something over the low roar of the room and I remember his fingers trailing down my back so damn well. I thought of that moment, replayed it over and over in my head, the following week when I shouldve been listening to someone talk to me or paying attention to a million other things. It was like I was back in 8th grade and the littlest touch and the “does he feel what I felt, feel the same?” even though I knew, I just knew, without having to ask.

Its been 8 years now. In just over a week we’ll celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary. And as I sit here right now I can feel our son kicking and squirming up a storm in my tummy.

Life.