Debt consolidation

New job. 

Going to get a debt consolidation loan. 

Pay off all the debts I owe. 

Make life easier for someone else. 

I tried to make it easy in the first place…but I do everything wrong. 

Tried to show her how much I love her. 

fail fail fail fail fail. 

Always. 

fail. 

I’m just a worthless fucking drunk and I can’t wait until it catches up to me. 

I’m also crazy. 

Like…seriously fucking crazy. 

Not like I hear things or take a shit in a frying pan or anything. 

I just have absolutely no control over my emotions. 

Or my addictions. 

I have no control over anything. 

And all it would take to gain control would be to just…do it. 

To just say "fuck this" and do it. 

 

But I don’t. 

Because I can’t. 

Because I just don’t. 

I guess I like misery. I must get off on it. 

Hahaha. 

God I’m such a fucking loser. 

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October 27, 2011

Can’t be anymore of a loser than I. Not like it’s a contest though, right. Good luck w/the new job.

Miserable people are the most artistic. As long as you can hold together some semblance of [society’s definition of] normality, you’re fine. “**** this!” is a great way of looking at life, actually- you’ll do more of what you want and less of what’s expected of you.

October 28, 2011

Also you **** in frying pans.

You don’t like misery, though sometimes it is pretty sexy. You can’t get over your addiction alone, Dane. You have to accept help. I know that sounds lame, but you have more going for you than being drunk. A FUCK OF A LOT MORE. I can see that you’re trying, and that’s good. I’d like to see you happy so step to it Mister!

That video/song was effin’ amazing by the way. The air humping was my favorite. Friends also enjoy, so thank you for your talents. 🙂