Before My Eyes…

Good eve to all. There seems to be so much pain lately…with OD, within my circle of friends, within myself. One part of my nature has always been to care, to love. When I see those I care about in pain, it hurts me too. I want so much to gather them in my arms and hold them close. To tell them it will be alright. I’ve always been that Tenshi Kanshi, the Guardian Angel. The dark angel. It is in my nature to protect, to care for, to love. Maybe that is one of the reasons that it hurts so much to be alone for me. I need the love of people, need to love others. And with my circle of friends shrinking, maybe that’s why so I’ve been so depressed as of late. I just want people that care about me, people that love me here with me. I do love you my OD friends, my internet friends. But I need someone here at this time. I need a hug, I need someone that will listen, that wants to listen. I need someone that is not afraid to love and be loved. As friends, or lovers, or soulmates, or whatever else fate and ourselves have in store for the future. *sighs* I want so much to help my friends in pain, but I want so much to feel loved. It has been a long time and sometimes I fear it will be much longer time still. I am not asking for the person to spend the rest of my life with, I’m not asking for a girlfriend or lover. I just want a true friend right now. And whatever happens from then on is in the future. I’m starting to ramble, so I’ll take my leave now.

Tenchi

“…the cultivation of the mind, the body, and the soul, and we must always cultivate the soul.”