quick entry

Hi Gang–

Yes, I know it has been awhile since I wrote.

Autumn is doing great… I will take more photos soon, I promise.

I, on the other hand, feel like crap. I am still sore from the c-section but it has only been 14 days.

I went to my Primiary Care doctor today due to the fact that I have a sinus infection. Joy of joys. Oh and my chest feels super heavy and I have a hard time breathing when I lay down. Chest sounds clear so he is not sure why I have the heaviness but if it is not better after being on the augmentin for a few days I am to call him back right away and maybe have a chest x-ray.

Being with baby by myself during the day is harder than I thought. She hates to be away from me. I hate to hear her cry. I tried for over 3 hours to get her to go down for a nap today… I even let her cry for 20 minutes before picking her back up… but NO DICE she had to sleep in my arms for at least 30 minutes before I could put her down in the bassinette. I was so exhausted I laid down for a nap too. First time I have done that during the day. Usually I try to straiten the house but I just could not do it today. I HAD to sleep.

I would still be sleeping but the Hospital called to see how I was doing. Ha Ha.

I have a tiny bit of depression. Not too bad. Just a little. I burst into tears allot. I get frustrated at things around me – but NOT at my daughter. Stupid things like the other day I went to move the bassinette and I broke the lamp in the bedroom. I cried for over 30 minutes while DH cleaned it up. I am such an idiot.

Starting next week will be the BIG test. DH is going out of town for two weeks. sigh. I will be ALL by myself with cutie pie. I expect the house will be a disaster for the whole two weeks.

Well she is waking up- I hear her calling me. I better run.

Love you all and will try to update more often and I will also try to snap some more photos.

only entry for today

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I read in a book once that you cant spoil a kid when they’re 0-3 months old by holding them a lot. I know it must be hard for you, but if you think about it… Autumn has been close to you for 9 months, so maybe she’s just a little more sensitive then other babies and it really effects her when you’re not near her that much anymore. Hope you get some rest and feel better soon!

May 25, 2004

It’s hard, I know. And c-section really isn’t some sort of easy way to give birth. Ouch. Mine still hurts sometimes and it has been 6 weeks. Blah. But it gets better. Atleast the baby blues. Kisses

Hugs and I hope it gets better.

May 25, 2004

ah get some sleep gurl LOL dont worry about tha house and stuff right now, especially since your still sore and not feeling well, just spend time with the baby and sleep! lol, my daughter was the same way (wanting to be held instead of sleeping in her bassinet or crib) good luck!!! = )

May 25, 2004

take care *hugs*

(((HUGS)))…I had Postpartum Depression really bad with our son. My heart goes out to you and I hope it passes for you quickly. You aren’t an idiot though.

It will get easier, sweety… Just take it one day at a time.. If the depression gets too bad… see a docter.

May 25, 2004

You’re breastfeeding, no? Maybe that’s why your chest feels heavy. There are different schools of thought what to do when a newborn cries: some say cudding her all the time will spoil her, while others say she must be cuddled to develop a sense of security. Personally I think it’s awfully hard to spoil a newborn; but you must do what you think best as her mom. Hope you get some sleep!

May 25, 2004

You are not an idiot hun!! I’m sorry to hear that you are still feeling a little under the weather due to your c-section, I do hope you feel better soon!

May 25, 2004

Well, honey your hormones are freaking out so don’t feel bad for being a lil extra sensitive. Have you thought maybe you have asthma? That is what my chest feels like… like someone is sitting on you chest and you’re trying to breathe

May 25, 2004

::hugs:: You will be wonderful without DH. You are a wonderful mom 🙂 He will miss the two of you I bet 🙂

May 25, 2004

try getting a sling to carry her around it. it helped me out alot in the early days after I could get up and move around.

May 25, 2004

I love hearing about your days with her 🙂

May 25, 2004

I’m so glad to hear from you – even sporadically. I swear reading the ODers is making me feel so much more comfortable about my own fears/concerns when my baby arrives. It’s kind of nice to see some people going through things and knowing that if I go through them too, it’s okay. *hugs*

May 25, 2004

I’m sorry you’re having such a bad time with your own pain and health issues 🙁 Expect that Autumn will continue to want to be close to you–after all she rode around in a nice warm thumpy place for 9 months..it feels odd for her to be alone. It will come with time. She’s only 14 days old after all! I keep you often in my thoughts, remembering how wonderful and difficult those first days are

good luck with DH gone! I’m sure you’ll be fine.

May 25, 2004

Don’t worry about the housework, you are a new mommy and when she sleeps you should try to rest too. There is a poem that i love that says: Sweeping and cleaning can wait for tomorrow, for babies don’t keep we’ve learned to our sorrow, so quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep, i’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep. So enjoy the time you have with her now, cuz she won’t stay little long >^..^<

May 25, 2004

I know you will do great while he is gone. I hope you get to feeling better soon. 🙂

May 25, 2004

It DOES get easier…..((HUGS)).

May 25, 2004

The mess has just begun! No matter how hard you try to keep the house picked up, the older they get the bigger the mess. Don’t pet the sweaty stuff! Enjoy her while she is so precious!

May 26, 2004

get some rest girl! i got depressed too but it got better after about 3 weeks hopefully yours will too:)

crying does not hurt the little one, you might want to try putting a clock near her that she can hear or play music on low to sooth her. My son was a pain with the hold me and after a while I was exhausted, just find some noise that is low and soothing, worked for me. Oh and naps are a beautiful thing when they are little. Take care. Hugs.

May 26, 2004

Don’t worry about the house honey. You should be taking it easy anyhoo! YOu could be a little depressed about feeling like shit. Major surgery will knock the socks right off you!LOL Isn’t there someone who can stay with you to help you when DH is out of town? Take care

It’s rough right now, but it’ll get better. Promise! Once she gets on a schedule you’ll be good to go. As for taking naps, don’t feel like while she is you have to be cleaning or whatever. That stuff can wait! You should nap while she is, too! *hugs*

take it easy, and when she naps, you nap too. Don’t worry about the house! ;o)

I hope you feel better! It’s gotta be hard. I’m praying for you! *HUGS*

May 26, 2004

With the last one I learned to doze while holding her in bed. I know a lot of parents don’t and won’t do this. Our second son didn’t sleep or settle down. He was something else. So when I got pregnant with her I thought that I have to be able to sleep. I would nurse her in bed and both Jim and I knew she was there and we would not roll on her. Blessings.

May 26, 2004

I remember those first few weeks. I didn’t think I would ever make it as a mom LOL. I cried after I had Tyler, cause, are you ready, I stepped on an ANT!!

May 26, 2004

Those hormones will straighten out soon. After Brandi was born, I broke into tears because a spider crawled across there floor. That was sad!!!

May 26, 2004

{{{{{}}}}}} it does get easier 🙂 Ireland was like that, I had to hold her all the time, I had to remind myself (like other noters have mentioned here) that she spent 9 months being so close to me, and that I’d probably be insecure if I were her too. Take care of yourself and baby, 🙂 ~ajaye

May 27, 2004

Sounds like you’re doing pretty well considering you have a tiny baby and just had a c-section. Make sure you keep resting whenever you can!

May 28, 2004

Wishing you the best.

June 2, 2004

I am glad to hear that she is doing well. I hope you feel better soon 🙂 stephanie