CyclingChick

March 22, 2006

Why you gotta bring up old sh*t?

Since I got bombarded with matrimony/breeding questions by an old friend recently, I feel the need to repost this glorious entry…and note that I *still* feel the same way…even now at 28.5 years old. Wow…such passion in my writing…I think I’ve become desensitized. I need to get my fire back…and embrace my inner bitch. LOL

Singletons and Smug Marrieds…

Friday, July 19, 2002

[rant]

Still with me? Okie dokie. My friend Lisa (soooo not her real name) is a fairly new bride/mommy. I’ve known her since high school and she’s always been ready to get married and breed. I have NO problem with that. However…she has now turned into what Bridget Jones would call a Smug Married.

The conversation started very innocently today. We were discussing the fact that several of our classmates are graduating from law school and jokingly (or so I thought) wondered what happen to our lives after high school. You know what she says? "I don’t know, but at least I’m married." She asked me when I planned to get married and have kids. I explained to her that it will happen in due time…and definitely not something I could plan on paper.

Well, she took it upon herself to PREACH to me. Apparently, because I wasn’t ready to get married TODAY she felt I was putting matrimony down? She goes on to say that although she didn’t have a "conventional" situation, she loves her husband and baby dearly…like I was slamming HER marriage. I told her to save the sermon because it was totally wasted on me.

What the hell is THAT about? She gets married and has a child…and now it’s her job to make sure everyone else gets hitched? PLEASE. She talked to me like I was a spinster with no hope left. Let me point out that Lisa is the FIRST pal in our old high school group to get married/breed. However, she acts like at age 24, my eggs are about to dry up…among other things.

I accused her of being a Smug Married and she denied it…even said that she’s jealous of us at times because she can’t just drop everything and hit the club anymore. LOL Apparently if you’re single and childless, your life only consists of being a club hopping whore….a superficial and pitiful attempt to mask the pain of not being married. LOL

Why does she feel the need to act superior because our situations are different? Is it her way of lashing out because maybe a shotgun wedding and unplanned blessed event aren’t exactly the way she pictured things? Or is she just a bitch that honestly feels sorry people not living in marital bliss? The world may never know.

Chesty and I are supposed to go see her and the baby this weekend. At this point, I’m not sure if that’s a good idea…? If she puts me down again, I may be forced to knock her in the head with the Diaper Genie…and junior doesn’t need to see violence at such an early age.

[/rant]

Jadalove

March 23, 2006

girl, you are so crazy! I can’t believe you posted this again. Like a refresher course or something!! Even still, I feel you on it. I hate it when people act like being married is the number one answer to every single problem you could ever have when in fact, it’s the exact opposite. I say live it up while you can. But I get the same kind of attitude from people because I don’t have any kids…

I’ll say this proudly for both you and I (well, and because I’m coming out of a really pissy mood and need to use this as an excuse to use a couple of bad words **grins wickedly**) To anyone who asks, you don’t know a damn thing about our lives/wants/needs. When your opinion is wanted, you will be asked for it. Until then, can I get you to shut the hell up, please? Thanks.

girl, that felt almost as good as an orgasm. The kind you don’t have to do any work to get. bwaaaahahahahahahaha! LOL!

I just looked at this title and I’m cracking up again… you are too much! (okay, no more notes)

Ankhesenamun

i’m getting a big kick out of the diaper genie comment….*giggles*

Linette

lol…I certainly was in no hurry to get married….I only got married under duress. My husband and I were “just friends” for many years, then he gave me an ultimatum–we get involved in more than a friendship or he walks. So…here were are, 9 years later….I do love him but he is pretty exasperating at times…Linette

OMG, if my mom had e-mail I would send her this post. She was soo pissed when I told her that I was finally settling down and that I was going to adopt a dog. She thought that it was NOT funny and that I needed to think about marriage and children. WHATEVER!! I will have kids when minivans are sexy and child care is free! Smooches…

^^^^looks up..^^^ I have to agree… minivans are the pits. The complete opposite of sexy. It’s a shame. that was my last note I swear.

Serilen

Oh, Bridget. There is so much wisdom in your words. Shotgun wedding! Mwahahah! You li’l wench you. ;)–

Mz Odd

March 24, 2006

sounds like she was jealous…. Having babies is not fun in real time. Misery loves company

She sounds like she has some personal regrets for getting married and having a child. It is easier to lash out to other ppl then face something hard inside yourself.You are right on the marriage thing. There’s no rush, in fact, there’s nothing wrong with not getting married at all. There’s enough ppl on our planet so breeding really isn’t necessary anymore.Great post!

i love this!!! you are the best!

Atrevida

Amen to ALL that girl!

momx3

I remember this entry…from 2002? Have I really been reading you that long?! I have the opposite problem – a single friend who says, if I’m complaining about anything like work or money or whatnot, “At least you’re married and have kids.” I’m always tempted to say “Oh I forgot, my life IS perfect!” ::rolls eyes::

..Jenn..

I get the “Well, if you were a Mom, you’d understand” line from the Moms here at the pool a lot… it’s SO IRRITATING. As if suddenly having the ability to ignore children screaming at the top of their lungs for absolutely no good reason is a GIFT? YIKES! I’d make a great mother. Just give me a sturdy chair and a roll or two of duct tape. 🙂

gemidevi

I have a friend like that. All I say to her is ‘I am a lesbian…and in the state of NM I can’t legally get married yet.’ She laughs and then shuts-up. But it’s a repetitious cycle. Great entry though!

MrsAmyB

You crack my shit up.

. i regret getting married so young. you change so so much between 22 and 29. i think if i would have waited i would have made a more mature and thoughtful choice, because marriage is not just about being in love. i married for love and now 7 years later i want to have kids, but he is not a financial provider so i can’t. it may sound superficial but it is a cold reality.

being single is so much better than being married and unhappy. You have to have a good head on your shoulders and consider what is important: MONEY, maturity, religion, in laws, common interests and goals, and so on. it may not sound romantic, but this is what determines a good marriage able to support children. i married for love, not practical reasons, and now i regret it.

"mrs cantina"

March 25, 2006

I was a little surprised. I definitely thought Duh-Gina would leave before The Pekingese. I knew that neither of them would make it to the top 3 or anything, but still, I thought Duh-Gina was GONE. I’m still hooked on Mollie Sue, Nnenna, and Leslie….Joanie’s not bad. And out of the Arkansas girls I’m going for Danielle, I guess….Furonda is a little…rough around the edges. What about you?

freckleface

LMAO! OH hell yeah! High five sista!

TheLassThatSews

March 26, 2006

RYN: aw c’mon! the tattoo is totally worth it! 😀 seriously!

RYN @ Lass’s: Chicken! *giggles*

Lisa is very insecure and immature if she believes that being married is the lifestyle of choice. Having experienced both states, I much prefer being single. No one should ever feel that being married is nirvana; it just simply isn’t. Have a great time in Vegas!