reasonable? or crazy?
I have a few questions, and I’m looking for some input. If you want to leave your note anonymously, feel free. (And for backstory on the issue, if you aren’t a regular reader, just look back to the past couple dozen of my entries.)
Is it reasonable of me, as a condition of mine and Aaron’s reconciliation, to insist that we go back to sharing a cellphone between us?
I’ll elaborate later, when I have time. Right now I just want to know what you guys think.
I think total and complete honesty is a necessity to trust each other. Whatever it takes for you to feel like you’re getting the whole picture. I don’t feel like that is too much to ask.
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I agree with the above noter. But, trust also comes with not having to watch the other person 100% of the time. Sharing a phone could be taken as babysitting him. And that would make him feel trapped and put a damper on reconciliation.
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I think that’s asking too much. I wouldn’t want to share with my husband because we are not around each other all day and have our own needs for a phone. I think trust has to come from other places than seeing who he’s called. He’s either trustworthy or not and sharing a phone probably won’t change that.
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I think it’ll be reasonable for you to ask for that. But, is it because of the text message thing? or cheaper/convienance? If all else fails, or if he disagree’s, explain to him WHY. Tell him that you know of the messages, and you disobeyed his trust. So, now, you need to have the right to check his messages from time to time.
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*cont. There are ways aroudn that though. He could delete them, etc. Depending on your carrier, you can check the messages online, or even through the bill that comes. I wish you luck!
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I do not think it is unreasonable
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i dont think its unreasonable at ALL. if he is serious about trying to reconcile he should do it!
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I think it’s a wonderful idea. I think that might even put your mind at ease. And its something that he should expect and understand. I say go for it!! GOOD LUCK!
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i don’t know what the situation is, but if there’s a trust issue, then i think it needs to be resolved. & if he wants you back, he needs to work with you on the trust thing. xx
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To me, it depends on the reason/intention of the request. I know if it were me, just the fact that I was looking for him to do something dishonest would keep me from being able to trust him rather than help me be able to. I’d have to jump in head first and trust him until he proved I couldn’t, rather than not trust him until he proved I could.
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I’m late, but I would agree to a degree. I don’t think I would be checking it 100% of the time. I wouldn’t want him to feel like I am being a parent. He has to earn trust back though. Good luck!
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I agree with Hillary’s note… You need COMPLETE honesty and trust. If that’s one of the conditions, then so be it.
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